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Forget-me-nots

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I want to die. 

It's a simple yet antithetical thought I reel back to when I feel like a 15 out of 10 on a scale of 1 out of 10 when ranking my depression. How I get to this conclusion is easy.  I think of my friends and family and factor out the ones I can and cannot count on and then the ones that actually answer the phone when I need a serious talk down from the ledge I'm on and the ones that don't and when it's all said and done only one person fits the bill. But sometimes even he isn't enough. My ex boyfriend Lucas. We were friends first which is why even when we've been broken up for 2 months I can call him at any time and he'll pick up the phone.

It was 12 am when I called him. He doesn't think it to be weird because if I'm calling this late I always have a damn good reason for it. He distracts me first because he knows something is wrong and talks about the auto con show he went to. He talks about the different cars he saw and which ones he definitely wants to own when he's older. This goes on for a while until he decides to mention my trembling voice. I say it's nothing and he doesn't push until I break down and then slowly he pries the issue out of me. "I'm here for you Frankie", he says and somehow everything feels better.

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⏰ Última actualización: Oct 16, 2019 ⏰

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