Newt Scamander x Reader One Shots

Never There (Part ONE)

Request from @Aiindyy . I was in the mood for some good ol angst so that's this chapter. They do make up in the next part!

(edited: 11/24)

You held your relationship with Newt very close to your heart. After being friends for so long, the two of you finally confessed your deeper feeling for each other and created a new and more intimate relationship. It's been the time of your life, and you don't think you'd want anyone else then Newt now. It might sound obsessive or too soon, but the way Newt treated you and cared for you so dearly made your heart flutter and stomach fluster.

Maybe he spoiled you at first. Newt did spend as much time as he could possibly spare with you and it made you feel so special, but lately, it hadn't been that way. You were so used to his constant presence that when you started to eat meals alone you felt your heart slowly break. You tried hard to not let it get to your head and think about how he has a life too, he doesn't always need you in it like it seems that you do.

But after two months of waking up alone and waiting for far too long at the dinner table for Newt to show up, you really started to worry. It couldn't all be you at this point, right? No, it couldn't. It wasn't. You had to talk to Newt about it now, it just... wasn't acceptable! You were a couple, you were his partner, you deserved to know where he was and if he was going to be home.

The only problem was when you would do it. The time you spent together was short and too precious for you to possibly break by now. You'd like to talk about it over dinner, but you've learned your lesson on that part. He wouldn't show up and then in the morning apologize then disappear. Then rinse and repeat. You were quite frankly, stuck.

You sighed, mixing the soup you made in the pot absentmindedly. You stopped doing simple things with magic recently. The process was too quick and then you were left with nothing to do. The muggle way got you through the day now. The soup began to steam in your face and you taste tested it, seeing it was all done. You nodded at your work in slight pride as you poured all the contents in the bowl. It was a waste of food to make for two when the other never shows.

Unexpectedly while you were eating in the living room, the door opened. You snapped your head up, meeting your lover's eyes. A slight annoyance slowly crept in your gut at seeing him, so silently you went back to eating your soup. It was quite delicious, you think you finally got the recipe right.

"Smells delicious, darling." Newt smiled at you, wandering into the kitchen. It was silent for a moment before you saw him wander back in the room. Predictable. "Is there any for me left?"

A part of you wanted to yell at him. How dare he expect you to make him meals when he doesn't even bother to tell you where he's at during the day and night! Yet you didn't. You couldn't. "I didn't make enough," You replied quietly, not meeting his eyes. "I didn't think you'd be home."

"Whatever do you mean?" He replied dumbly, hanging his coat on the rack and removing his shoes. You sighed, setting the bowl down.

"Honey, we need to talk." You put your hands in your lap, your fingers twitching. Damn, you were nervous. You shouldn't be, but god you were. What if it leads to a fight? You have never been in a fight with Newt before. And you didn't want to, but if that's what needed to happen...

Newt sat on the chair next to your seat, and that slightly made your stomach clench. He was so naturally distant now. You remember when he always sat next to you. It was such a simple act but now it seemed like a dream. It was unrealistic for you to even sleep with him in the same bed!

Okay, one thing at a time. You took a deep breath. "Lately," You started slowly, trying to carefully think your words. "..Lately, I don't feel important."

"Pardon?" He cocked his head, confusion shining in his eyes. You purse your lips together.

"You're never home. I'm always alone here. Cooking meals you don't eat and sleeping in an abandoned bed. I never know where you're at and when you come home it's always so short. I just... I feel so alone now. Where are you? Why are you always gone?" You found your voice cracking and your hands shaking, but you wouldn't cry. Not now. You've kept it together so long, not now, not now....

"You know where I am," Newt argues, albeit slightly. Naturally defending his actions since he probably never meant to hurt you. He didn't mean to, but that doesn't justify that he did. "You know how important my work is. I- my creatures need me. I need them. I thought you understood that." And suddenly, shifting the blame on you, as if chastising you for feeling bad. You wince in the guilt and depression that washes over you.

"I- I do understand. I do. But... I'm important too, aren't I?" You look at him, somewhat desperately. "I need to know that I mean something to you still, Newt."

"Of course you do. These creatures... My work is my everything. I need you to realize that," he dares to try and hold your hand. You flinch away, making him keep his hands in his own lap, staring at the ground. "You're not my creatures. You can take care of yourself, you know? You can't be my everything like they are. I can't love you like that."

The message behind his words is... striking. Makes your blood run cold and eyes water.

You let out an unexpected sob and covered your mouth. He... He was...

"You're my everything," Your voice shook, and you curled into a ball on the couch, "I love you," you choked on your own spit as you said it. His words were booming in your mind. You didn't matter. You weren't important. He didn't love you. You should have known!

"___, I," Newt stuttered, reaching out for you again, immediately feeling guilty. He didn't mean to say it, he was just-

"Don't touch me!" You cried, slapping his hand away. It broke his heart to see your face. You were so upset, and all because of him. "If I-I'm obviously s-s-so un... unimportant to you then just l-leave!" Your voice was cracking and Newt could barely understand you. He tried once more to reach out for you before you shouted. "GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!"

You sobbed again, letting out a pathetic noise as you hid your face in your legs. Stupid, worthless, pitiful. When you heard Newt's steps leave the apartment and the door close, you screamed. Pulling at your hair, crying over yourself and how pathetic you were. Stupid, stupid, stupid!

You loved him.

And he threw it all away. And Merlin if that didn't hurt. Merlin if it didn't.