Inspirational How I Met Your Mother Quotes

Barney Stinson Quotes

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You're my best friend,all right? You don't have to tell me I'm yours. But the way I see it,we're a team. Without you, I'm just a dynamic uno.

Ted,bubbeleh,if you have a crazy story I was there,it's just a law of universe.

Here's the mini-cherry on top of the regular cherry on top of the sundae of awesomeness that's my life.

In my body, where the shame gland should be is a second awesome gland. True story.

Advising Ted not to look up old girlfriends:"There are only two reasons to date a girl you already dated: breast implants.

I am Mr.charity. I frequently sleep with sixes,chubsters,over Thirty's. I am the Bill and Melinda Gates of the sympathy bang.

Describing the simplicity of running a marathon: "step one, you start running... There is no step two.

God,it's me,Barney, what up? I know we don't talk much but I know a lot of girls who call out your name because of me.

Every Halloween, I bring a spare costume in case I strike out with the hottest girl at the party. That way,I have a second chance to make a first impression.

Don't beat yourself up. He'll be fine. I mean, the Guy's like a billionaire. He can put his platinum card on a fishing line and win ten chicks hotter than you.

Chastising Ted for waiting to have sex with a woman:" The only reason to wait a month for sex is if she's 17 years,11 months old ".

It's hard to be friends with me because I'm so awesome.

It's like they're old friends, complete with Inside jokes. And you get to relive those inside jokes on a weekly basis.

Everyone I know is getting married or pregnant I'm just getting more awesome.