DROP OUT

Chapter VII

Song: White

Pic: Alexandra Forest

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Alex's POV

January 9, 2017

  Yep. New year, 2017. It our first day back to school from winter break. In this time I painted a lot, I hanged out with Sofia and the boys, and I continued playing piano. Anyways other than that it was pretty normal. I got out the shower and had a towel around my body. Walking towards my cupboard I decided on black joggers, a white tank top, and my white Adidas. I changed quickly and left my hair how it was; a knotty, untamed mess. I also added a snapback that was black N' white. I don't know, black and white seem to be my theme colors today. I grabbed my phone and headphone along with my keys and descended down the stair case. Jennifer and Spencer we're already gone like always. They left a note like always, telling me to behave and yada yada yada.. I locked up the house and stood outside for a few minutes smoking a cigarette. Speaking of which, I met up with Sammie, told him about my "situation" and how I needed his help. Like always he said he would help me out and it's been a couple days. I never usually smoke but desperate times calls for desperate measures. Once I finished I got in my car and drove the normal ten minutes to get to Hell, also formally known as high school. I parked my car up front like always. I turned off my baby and sat there with my eyes closed and my sunglasses on. I took a deep breathe, got out and walked inside. I had my headphones in with my phone in my pocket walking towards my locker. I arrived at my locker with Sofia staring at Brandon, Aaron on his phone and Sebastian leaning against the locker next to mine. "What's goin' on here?" I asked as I opened on my locker grabbing a notebook and a pen for my classes. "Just waitin' on you" Aaron said looking at me. I didn't say anything else. When the bell rung Brandon and Aaron stood on either side of me, like they always do. Since we have geometry together but this time I felt a cold stare as Aaron wrapped his arm around my shoulder. I turned on my head only slightly to see Sebastian leaning against the same locker staring coldly at him. 'What's up with him' I shrugged my shoulders at the thought and kept walking away with the two boys side by side.

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Geometry, and Biology went by surprisingly fast and now it's the end of our Art class. As soon as the bell had rung everyone rushed out the class. I stood up and walked out the classroom to see Sebastian leaning against the wall. As I started walking he stepped in synch with me. "Why do you always wear sunglasses even in the indoors?" The question took me off guard. I didn't say thing but stared straight ahead of me. "My mom's eye's" I stopped in the middle of the hallway and faced him. You looked confused and I just gave a small sad smile. "I have my mom's eye's. I wear the sunglasses because most people knew my mom and well I guess I remind them of her." I slipping off my glasses, "These are the eye's of the woman who died many years ago" I paused, but only for a few short seconds.

"I guess in a way, I remind myself of her too. And I don't deserve that" I said calmly but the inside of me was burning, and my heart was aching. "You know, after they died, I never once visited them, their graves. I never told them how much I loved them" I stated and put my glasses back on. I didn't cy, and I didn't show any emotion. He stood silent, not saying a word. "Well, I'll see you later, Sebastian"

^^^Bar^^^

I've been at the bar since I left school. I skipped the rest of the day. I talked with benny and had a few shots. "So, when are you coming to see the Reeds again, Bens?" He looked up from the counter he was wiping and shrugged. "Don't know." I looked at my phone to check the time, 1:43PM. I also noticed a message from Sammie. Yes, cause after I texted him that one night, and I had a free chance to talk to him we decided to meet up over break. I told him about the 'situation' I was in. Right, so I told you about that.

'Meet me at the old bridge in 20'

"Alright Bens. I gotta get going." I hugged him and told him to come visit some time. I left the bar and about 15 minutes later, I was at the old bridge. The one where I used to sleep under, the one where Benny found me, then Riley. I sat in the car until I saw Sammie. I got out and put my phone on silent, then slipping it into my pocket. As soon as I was standing in front of him, he embraced me tightly. "S-Sammie..c-can't breathe." I mumbled between every breath I got. "Oh, sorry. Sometimes I forget about your small figure." I just glared at him. Sammie was about 5'11, brown eyes, and slick black hair and totally charming. He had a good life but back when I was Riley and he left, he used to help me out." We talked for a few minutes before he handed me a small bottle filled with pills. "These are hallucinogenic. You take one now, it'll take about 45 minutes before you start feeling anything. They'll last about four to six hours" I took the bottle from him, and hugged him. We waved each other bye and I sat in my car, staring at the bottle. I opened the cap and popped one in my mouth. It was a small pill, so it went down easy. I gripped the steering wheel and leaned my head against it.

What am I doing to myself.. Mom and Dad would be so disappointed in me.. I whispered to myself quietly.

But they're not here.. That small voice at the back of my mind said. And it was right, they're not here. They're not here to see how much of a fuck up I turned out to be...

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A/N: Don't hate me. I was trying to figure what to do with this chapter and how I wanted it to play out, even if it's a super short chapter. I started thinking about what I wanted to do for the next 2 or 3 chapters and I have it, which is a surprise. And instead of updating every Sunday I decided to, in a course of 2 weeks, I'll write at least 3 to 4 chapters and update them on either a Saturday or Sunday. I'll end up writing the next chapter this week and start the next. Thank you.

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Published January 1, 2017