heartburn {jemily}

Two.

Our unsub struck again. As soon as JJ and I get to work, we spot new crime scene photos up on the board.

"Fuck," I mutter under my breath. I urge myself to look at the pictures, because it is my job and I have to.

I take one good look at the first picture. A woman lies in her bathtub, her stomach sliced open as well as her neck. I can almost feel the cool blood that flows down the woman in this picture.

"What's her name?" I ask, my voice faltering.

"Emma Perry. She was 23 years old, she had an abortion 3 months before her death." I turn around after Aaron Hotchner, my coworker and unit chief, finishes his sentence. I nod, swallowing the lump of emotion caught in my throat.

"I'll be right back," I announce, shuffling past my team and heading to the bathroom.

I push the bathroom door open, locking myself in a stall. I bend down, throwing up into the toilet. I empty out everything that is in my stomach, feeling like it will never end. Luckily, I finally gain control. I flush the toilet, resting my exhausted body on the stall walls.

I place my hand on my forehead; I'm burning up. I close my eyes, but closing my eyes tightens and traps me in an endless slideshow of those gruesome images.

A small tear slips down my cheek and I quickly wipe it away. I can't let anyone know that this is affecting me, I can't let anyone worry about me. Nobody can find out, and I can't let anyone's feelings get compromised.

I try to push myself to my feet, but dizziness rushes over me and my bowel reacts again. I release some more vomit into the toilet, remains that I didn't know I had left.

I hear the bathroom door creak open, and I panic. I want to bounce up and hide in plain sight, but if I do, I'll throw up again.

"Emily?" I sigh in relief. It's JJ.

I flush the toilet quickly, unlocking the bathroom door from my position on the cold tile.

"Emily!" JJ rushes over to me, kneeling on the floor and feeling my forehead for any hint of my condition.

"You look deathly pale, Em. Are you okay?" She wonders.

"I just threw up four times, so I'd say I'm not," I reply, trying to disguise the disgust in my voice.

"You look terrible, Em. I think you need to go back to the hotel and get some rest," JJ ponders, standing up and walking to the bathroom sink. I sigh in relief.

"Yeah, I really don't feel good at all. Must've been something I ate." The blatant lie slips out of my mouth like clockwork.

JJ walks back to me with a wet paper towel. "Here, wipe your face with this." I take the towel hesitantly from her, smiling as to give a silent thanks. I place the paper towel to my face and I immediately feel a short and cold relief.

"Here, have a mint." My colleague hands me a mint and I gladly pop it in my mouth.

"Are you okay to stand up now?" I look up at Jennifer and I nod.

"Okay, I'll help you." JJ wraps her arm around me and helps me to my feet. Dizziness overpowers me and I start to tumble, but JJ catches me.