ADDICTED

Finding myself

You want to know all about my story?
who I really am?
where it all began?
how it started?
14, and homeless to start off.
alcoholic mother, heroin addicted father.
both there, but both way past gone.
looking for a way for another drink,
looking for away to get more stash.
it was a never ending cycle,
so you would assume, having it rough growing up would have made me think twice about many of my decisions.
some good,
some horrible.
but, it didn't make me think at all,
I wanted to rid myself of all that pain,
that
was
exactly
what
I
did.
after all, I was a big girl.
taken care of myself, and my younger brother when my mom was going through another bender.
I was only seven when my mom brought him home,
and only eight and a half when she decided to pick up the bottle again.

A few years later things started to change when my mom had gotten sick, and went in for a major open heart surgery.

All seemed great after the surgery, and my mom was recovering fast. 
She had all of her old demons back, oh and mine
were just starting to thrive.
my grandma started to care for both my brother and
I when my mom was to wasted.
I was fourteen, Almost fifteen . When she was fully recovered.
And
  I
   Had
      Just
         Discovered
             Myself.

I should probably introduce myself,
And my family. I'm Leigh Ann Fitzgerald, My brother is Adam Lee Fitzgerald. My mom Cathy, my grandma Ellen Fitzgerald. House Maid, for the really really wealthy people, my mom was also in the cleaning business.
That is until she fell off the band wagon, dragging me with her.
I was a good child growing up, A's-B's in school, honor roll a few times. Even student of the month once or twice,

That is until I picked up the bottle, and started cutting class, with the occasional pot party!
I started hanging out with the cool kid "click" weed smokers, and dealers of the school.
Eventually I was hanging in the ally behind the high school every morning just to get my wake and bake on.
I met my best friend Rose in high school, she had just gotten out of a relationship, (her boyfriend dumped her that day while she was at school! Can you believe that?)
Anyway, we instantly hit it off and became best friends, oh yeah and stoner pals.
(Or stoner sisters, that is)
We also became drinking buddies, cutting class to just drink, until they threatened to kick us out.

One night, I was staying at Rose's house, (Her grandma's, but her and her siblings were staying there until they got a new place!) and I had gotten my monthly bloody show, called my mom to bring me some tampons, Rose didn't have periods, so she didn't have any. Well my mom came completely wasted, (good thing Rose only lived a few blocks away from us) and my mom offered us a few drinks, and some Xanax. Of course we took the drinks, and the Xanax on a school night. Oh well.
My mom and I got into fist fight, and she broke my jaw. The next morning I called the police, and was still at Rose's house.
The cops came, took a million pictures of my jaw, sent me to the hospital.

And went to track my mother dearest down to arrest her for child abuse, went to the court house and got an OP (restraining order) on her for the next 2 years, Rose's mother Carol took custody of me, and we moved from Rose's grandma's, and moved in with Rose's SIL (Sister in law) Chelsea, and her 3 children and new current boyfriend Devon.
Rose and I started smoking K2 which was my first ever real addiction, we used to get so high, and have so much fun.
Until we all got too addicted and started having WAY to much fun.

It was summer, right after our junior year when we became addicted and alcoholics. Drink a little liquor and smoke some fake weed, get real tweaked. And wake up to do it all over again, until one day we all had to move out of Chelsea's, we ended up moving to Reno,
And I, Leigh moved here not looking for love, but
Somehow
Love
Was
Looking
For
Me.
Or at least I thought it was.
Our first week there I had met a guy named Jordan.
In a sense he was more attractive on the inside, not the hottest on the outside.
He was smart,
And kind.
He had a big heart,
Anyway,
We drove around one night on the outskirts on a dirt road, you could see the mountains in the pink sunset lighting.