Sleepwalker

Chapter Thirty: In the Wood

Dill tried to grab my arm, but I ran from the house into the bitterly cold air. My limbs burned with the desire to be as far from the table as possible. The same purpose in mind, the direction I traveled did not matter. A rock hit my foot, and I crashed into the ground. Small cuts stung my hands, even my cheek, but I ignored it, focused solely on forgetting the scar in my side and escaping the wretched house.

The aching in my calves and lungs from sprinting seemed to help. With one shiver, sobs threatened to rack my entire body. Nausea came first. I was able to lift myself to my knees before I started to heave. Acid burned in my throat, less corrosive than the scorching rejection. I clutched at my middle, choking down the sludge.

Armadillo found me like this. Kneeling beside me, he tucked my hair back before turning away to let me vomit my small breakfast into the snow. “I’m sure you don’t know the whole story, Jenny. She missed. That’s for certain. Perhaps she missed on purpose.”

 “Missed on purpose? Yes, Dill, I’m sure that was it. My own mother tried to murder me. Damn shame that her knife slipped.” Tears spilled down my cheeks.

“Quiet. Let’s look at the facts. She did not aim for your chest clearly. She did not continue until she was assured that you were dead. And if we’re going on the presumption that she is the woman from Dunver, she even took time to heal you. She brought you to your father, didn’t she? Well, what if she couldn’t have you?”

I furrowed my brow. Rationality cracked through the devastation. “You mean… that because she and my father were not wed…that she might not have been allowed to have me? What if knowing she could heal me…she staged it? Or she did it to rid herself of me and then found a more suitable option. Do you really think that could be it?”

He brushed his thumb under both of my eyes, swiping away the tears. “Of course, I do. No woman would ever be stupid enough to want to kill you. Would you like to go back to the archives and see if you can find a recent document on her?”

I hesitated, “I…I’m not sure. I suppose so.” A rustling in the brush distracted me.

Dill grabbed my wrists and helped me stand. “I don’t like the sound of that.”

“I thought bears were only in the east,” I teased, wobbling on unsure legs. I studied the bushes again as nervous as Dill. “But then again, I’m not sure that’s a bear.” I followed him out of the woods. The tall trees overhead were familiar, a source of comfort. “I am so misplaced in the city. It is no wonder they scoff at me,” I murmured.

“When I was young, I was under the illusion that the people of Eirodin judge only based on intellect. When my family visited, my father took me into the heart of the city to observe the people and laughed as my ideals crumbled before my very eyes. I do not believe his laughter has ever stopped ringing in my ears.” His eyes were far off.

“You live to please him, don’t you?” I asked. When he did not reply, I continued, “It’s nothing to be ashamed of. I do the same. My father often tells me that his inn will be mine someday and it is not a fate that I fight, no matter the discontentment it brings me.”

He turned from me, still not speaking. When he finally looked at me, he said quietly, “You mentioned once that you have an excessive dowry. Though I am sure marriage is still several years from you, but your father has not selected a suitor for you?”

I smiled, “My dowry has been a joke between my father and I for many years. I am sure it is not that great, but I worry about his choice of a suitor,” I confessed.

“You fear he will choose someone unsuitable?” Dill asked, cocking his head.

I studied my feet, “If he did, I would fear my own reaction.” I struggled against my words. When he lowered his eyebrows in confusion, I added, “You see, when I was a little girl, I rarely voiced my opinions especially if I disliked something.”