How Would You React?

The Trigger

Karma is a bitch, I am willing
To work with him, but bad mind let us kill him.
She tried to stop him but he never even tried to listen.
She even tried to beg and said that she is willing
She told him there was another way
he told her to shut up and stay
Tearing off her clothes, gently, she obeyed
With her eyes wide open, she slowly decays
Into the darkness he drew, that day scared my memory
But they are friends today, inseparable like Martin Luther is to black race today.
I study you so quickly
How is it that you never noticed
you were slowly killing me
I flinch when you smile
I've noticed you changed
In fact you got a daughter and thing
finally got a purpose in life now
Now I hear you course out a guy for rape
Seems like you forgot ha! so did I
After all I was such an easy bait
But I love now you like a brother
We grew up together too
I enjoy seeing you behave sophisticated and wise
I respect that I really do
But in the end you hurt me
Who innocently begged you to stop
Yes! I know you were young and foolish, weren't so young to know about feelings
Felt so much for one girl you tattooed her initial on your own skin
And I watched her betrayed you
We could have been together today think about it ?
If you could respect my decision in the same way
Why did you ??
B...b...b...because I seem neglected
Oh now I know, yea I found out
You consider me weak and timid you said it yourself
But what you didn't know was there is a price to pay for everything you do in life
And I am that price
Right now it's my turn
I got the chance to see fear instilled in a person's body
I got the chance to take advantage of one fear
Let them feel each and every stroke that was given
Let them feel everything you think about it how painful it is to keep it inside from the world
But I've grown with a mentality developed to block negativity and judgemental behavior
So instead of hating this person I am clinging on.
Deep down I don't want to do it
But I believe that it has to be done
Oh my god! What am I suppose to do
I deserve better I want to be happy for once just not to have to prove nor entertain for the sake of others
I want all the persons who
hurt me to burn in hell but this one I feel I'll send him in the mail
I love him now because he has changed for the better and seeking a better life.
You got a job I am happy for you
I hope you make enough money to save toward you daughter's college from early
So if you pass off she'll be alright
I adore her I love seeing her huge head and tiny mouth
Ha, she got your mouth too
She is a beautiful blessing
I wouldn't want to be the one to take you away from her
But she needs to understand that father did some really bad things to people
God forgives, but some what god said that the shit between you two is on your own you can either forgive him or get him out of your future
So now I am thinking ......
You sit there looking at me wondering if I have the guts!
Let me tell you something Mr.
If I had the guts to keep it
I should find the guts to let it go
I selected the 9mm glock

Breathing heavily I looked in to his eyes
Why? Why you have me living these lies
I am so sorry for all this but if getting back at you harms me
Then so let it be

You sit and laugh with your friends the same friends that you inveigled to do the same
Yea! It was good wasn't it ,yea I know
I got a man now who loves it
He loves it so much he named it
You are close to him and that's the problem, I can't have you derailing my relationship
He loves me and seeing you face every time reminds me why I must cherish him more and more.

Crying......how can you understand have anyone raped you called you freak, stupid, worthless
No one sees the world from my eyes and the never will
I shouldn't be looked at like a piece of dirt on the floor
I keep telling myself
Fix yourself
Pick up yourself
Make something of yourself
Everyone has there flaws its what's on the inside matter
Life is worth so much more
How can you feel peace?
When you close your eyes all you feel is numbness, not peace and eventually we will close our eyes.