~Self Conscious~

~Introduction~

I do not own any of these pictures.

Well..how can I put this...I'm an under regular female in the life of school. To tell you the truth I suck at being a female and would rather be a male. Like my brother would rather be a female. Which is why my older brother saved up to pursue his dream and become a trans. Yes a transgender. Sounds weird but I actually think its pretty cool. When our parents found out about him coming out of the closet, they were shocked of course but the look on my father's face was priceless. His face lit up like a tomato. He nearly choked my brother but my mom managed to talk him out of it. After a year of being disclaimed by our father my brother left out of town to become a trans, his hard work and savings had finally paid off. The moment he  walked into the front door everything stopped. How I knew it was him was because of that cheeky smile he always gave me. His cheeks were now perfectly sculpted, his lips now pink and plump instead of nude and flat. His eyes flattering yet daring framed with his long dark eyelashes he always had, and his short yet long hair dyed white to accompany his attractive looks, compared to my simple dark brown hair that stopped at my shoulder blades, small pink perky lips, high cheek bones, and small brown eyes, I was nothing. My mom hugged him in tears as my father mumbled curse worlds and left out for a cigarette break...and that was the last time I saw him...

Late that night my mom could be heard crying in her room as she argued with our father over the phone. I was eavesdropping as I walked passed on my way from the kitchen to the room my brother and I shared. "He's still your son Jason! Our son! You can't just leave your whole family because of our son's dreams!" I only shook my head and continued to my room. My brother was looking at my new nail polishes I of course never use. I could tell he heard everything I was hearing but chose not to acknowledge it.

"Becka." The way he said my name was always so childish. Even though he was the oldest he had the personality of a kid. 

"Bet." I said his name in a mocking tone rolling my eyes before picking up my phone to check my messages. His name was weird to the kid's at our school but Bet graduated a year ago, so at least he got away from the grasp of torturing teens. No more harassment or being called a fag, were the last words he said before stepping onto the plane that was flying to his dreams.

"My name isn't Bet anymore. Call me...Rebecca." My brother thought about it before looking at me for my approval. 

"Nah that's whack. How about, Synthea?" I said shrugging, turning my phone off giving him my full attention.

"What am I? 30 years old? Give me another one." Bet was painting his nails black on the floor by the fan. 

"Ok um..Becky with the good hair?" I said smirking. I loved playing with my brother. Even if he had the face of a girl now. 

"Nooo Becka...I want something unique.." He was checking out his fingers before blowing on them. The smell of nail polish made my head hurt. Makes me wonder why mom kept buying them for me. I told her hundreds of times that they made me sick.

"Juno?" I looked at my brother who perked up staring at me. 

"That's perfect Becka! I love it!" He tackled me into a hug. His scent wasn't that cologne dad always made him wear but it was a now sweet and fragile type of perfume. 

At this point and for now on my brother name was now Juno. Bet was long gone with no intentions on coming back.