Hold Me Closer

Chapter 3: Alex

     Maybe the date went better then I thought it would- not that I thought it would go badly. Once we got back to my room Damien decided to stay a little longer then he had planned. I tried to make sure we weren't all over each other too much- Sam was in the room and I would be mortified if my boyfriend and I did something even remotely inappropriate with him as witness.

     After a while Sam left the room with no warning of how long he'd be gone- not that he told me much anyway. That unfortunately led to where we are now. That is on the floor having a decent make-out session. I honestly should know better. Sam could walk in at any moment and that would be the worst thing that could happen. Well, technically the second worst thing, but that would never happen.

      I shift back to catch my breath when I realize that there's someone in the doorway. I sit up with supersonic speed and see that Sam's standing there staring at us. I open my mouth to apologize, but before I can say anything Sam turns around and slams the door shut behind him.

     I jump up apologizing to Damien and go after Sam. He's standing out the hallway leaning on the bare wall with a blank look on his face staring at the opposite wall.

"Sam? Look, I'm sorry. I didn't mean for that to happen," I say, slowly approaching him.

"Yeah, whatever. Listen, you're a pretty decent guy, but you've got to stop bringing him into our room like that," Sam says pushing of the wall.

"Okay," I say feeling guilty and a little dejected. I didn't mean to make him uncomfortable. I didn't think he'd mind a whole lot. Especially because for the first half of the semester he had girls of all kinds in the room and they definitely didn't use much discretion.

     I walk back into the room and tell Damien that from on we'll have to go to his room after dates. His roommates hardly ever there so maybe that'd be better. The only reason we don't go to his room is because it's the farthest from everything on campus and I hate walking in the dark- I'm not a very tough or muscular boy and I'm very openly gay and most of the campus population isn't totally accepting of that.

     Once my boyfriend leaves I flop down on my bed and throw my arm over my eyes. I try my best not to let it get to me and to not cry. It really isn't that big a deal really. I just hate seeing Sam mad at me. For most of the school year I've had a huge crush on my obviously straight roommate and no amount of time away or boyfriends has changed that so far.

      I hear the door open and close and Sam shuffling around on his side of the room- he never came over to my side of the room and would freak out a bit if I go on his side. I roll over and wipe at my eyes with my sweater sleeves just on case some tears had managed to escape.

      I run my hand across the cold paint of the wall. It was the standard white paint, just like the floors are the standard dark blue carpet. I focus on how many scuffs are in the wall- all made by me and my inability not to throw stuff onto my bed a bit too hard.

      I let my hand drop and bury my head in my arm. I can't stop thinking about Sam. Maybe I need some personal time with my boyfriend. There is a break coming up soon. I make up my mind to ask him his plans for the break. I know his roommate and Sam are both going to go home so I'd be the perfect time to be alone together- not that we'd do much.

     I feel myself drifting off and smile to myself thinking about the plans we could make for break. It's decided then. I'll ask him and try to forget about Sam. I fall asleep thinking about my boyfriend for the first time.