The earth revolves around the sun. The moon revolves around the earth. The universe seemed to revolve around me, until now.
What started off as a typical day, turned into the day I realized that the universe doesn't revolve around me. Ok, ok, it's virtually impossible for me to be the center of this enigmatic universe, but in my mind I was. I studied astronomy. Studied? More like lived, breathed astronomy. The universe always interested me. I felt comfort in learning more about this place I've been living for 16 years. I formed many opinions about this place, some I will die with and some I will share without hesitation. We could never be alone in this massive void, or we could be. I believed that even the minor planets mattered, because why not? They exist so they matter. I mattered.
My friends made me seem significant, powerful, vital, so many words to describe one feeling. So many words, but the words do it no justice. The way I felt was out of this world. My life wasn't perfect. The universe wasn't perfect. Perfection is unattainable. I aimed for perfection despite knowing the truth. The universe is seen as a well-ordered whole. The universe contains evil. Perfection and evil can't coexist. The truth remains that perfection cannot and doesn't exist.
August 27th, 2015, the day my own little cosmos got destroyed by evil. Ended. Demolished. Annihilated. Sixteen years destroyed in a second. I had to face the reality that my existence was only a small blip in time.
Hello, my name's Mali, and Acute Myeloid Leukemia destroyed me. Or, it possibly made me realize how imperfect life really is. I had many dreams before that day. As the words entered my ears and I processed them, my dreams were shattered. New dreams were formed. My old dreams now sound frivolous. Before I leave this universe, I want to be one with it. Really be one with it, breathe it, live it, and eventually be it. I have to make a difference.
Life wasn't black or white for me, it was gray. It had to be gray. Can't be one or the other. They have to coexist.
YOU ARE READING
Cosmos
Teen Fiction"We must embrace pain and burn it as fuel for our journey." - Kenji Miyazawa. Mali's life changes in the fraction of moment when she receives the news that equals life or death. After being diagnosed with Acute Myeloid Leukemia, her life cha...
