The thrill of changing people is what I live for. I have long ago learned how to read people like an open book. The game only brings a rush of excitement; tearing people down, and bringing others up. Dropping them into a pool of sharks all by themselves with no one to fend for them. Quite fun actually, to watch them squirm under the pressure of this so called popularity they want so much, only to find the horrible task of maintaining this status.
Oh well.
This week I have my eye out on a certain boy. He has a boyish, geeky cuteness aura around him. So innocent, so shy, so much fun to watch as he squirms to reply to my simple little hey, in the hallways.
As I walk towards English, I caught a glimpse of Carson Wade, his brown hair and thick glasses, and brown eyes are so adorable on him. If only he had a clue, he's so whipped I barely have to try...but to maintain my little act I have to really sell it on my good girl act. I turn around, knowing he is right behind me.
He smiled at me happily. I am so going to win this bet Debra, I thought. “You look pretty happy today,”I said
“I am. It's a pretty good day,” Carson said. I felt a bit disappointed, only for a second, it's been three weeks, when the hell is he going to ask me out? No anger, just disappointment, aren't I good enough? “Wanna go out?”
My eyes caught a hold of his, waiting. Did my ears deceive me? Did Carson Wade finally come up with the courage to ask me out? This is all falling into place, all I need to blush...check. Keep a steady hold of his eyes...check, he is so whipped by the way. Jut out my bottom lip, just a bit too make me seem oh so innocent. “Sure,” I said smiling, making my voice sugary sweet, light and airy, soft but not too much.
“I mean like on...like on date type things.” Carson said, clarifying. I would too if I had a twin self out there, but male version, knowing me, I never mean anything.
I let out a carefree little laugh, “Yeah, I got that.” I looked into his eyes again and saw real emotion, he didn't want my body, he's too innocent for that. What this boy wants is love, and I can make it happen.
The only thing is, I am a double bladed knife, you want my love? You also receive my bleeding pain. I'll be embedded into his brain, the scene of me crushing him down will make Debra's incident seem like nothing. He will feel so much betrayal, so much pain, so much sadness, it thrills me to see it all happen, to see tears fall out, to hear his begging pleas for the reason why I would do such a thing. The biggest thrill of all, is to see Debra, appearing through the crowd and us chanting the words she had said to him not too long ago.
No one would date you. No one will love you. You will die alone. You will be alone. You will have no one. No one will have you. Now get out of my face, and if you try to talk to me again, I will punch you.
