How to Attract a Time Lord (Doctor Who)

Doctor

I nearly jumped out of my seat, but I knew that voice well.

"Maybe if you were a little clearer on which car it was, it wouldn't have taken me so long, Mr. Sass. How did you even get this car anyway? And, how did you get in it without the freaky alien things noticing?" I demanded, not taking my eyes off the road for even one look at the person in the backseat.

"I was clear! Clear as water!"

"From the rivers of Africa. You still didn't answer my questions," I mocked him.

"I don't need to. And you don't need to insult my pride." I looked in the mirror above to the left of my head at him as he turned around, curiously peering out the back windshield. Whatever he saw, it must have been funny, because he chuckled quietly to himself. Finally speaking up, he teased me with, "Oh, just so you know, they're right on our tail."

"Is your sense of humor one where you find monsters chasing me, probably to kill me, and you, absolutely hilarious?"

"Well. . ." he paused before managing, a wide smile on his features, "they're driving the car that you broke the handle off of. And the door refuses to stay close, so the one in the passenger seat is holding onto it for dear life. Also, they are way too tall for the car, so they're both hunched over, practically in half." He added another laugh.

I couldn't help but smile. But that smile quickly disappeared when the light turned red right before I crossed the intersection. Hitting my brakes, I slowly turned around, dreading what I'd see. Would they get out of the car? Would they hit our car? The suspense only turned out to be the driver staring at the light impatiently, waiting for it to turn green. I laughed in spite of the situation. The passenger was the only other life form in the car, but it had given up on holding the door closed. It was just sitting there, looking bored, not looking at me or the man in the backseat.

He finally looked at me, and gave me a cheesy grin.

"Doctor, you're teasing me about taking long enough? It's been at least a month and a half," I sighed with the second sentence, remembering all the hope of the month and a half. "But, let me guess," I started, "It's only been an hour for me," I badly mimicked his voice.

"47 minutes and 38 seconds, to be exact," he retaliated from the back as the light turned green and I began the reckless driving again. "Sorry. Sexy was having a few problems and I had to take care of some problems on Satellite Five."

"Sexy?"

"My time machine. The TARDIS."

"Okay. . . and I assume you know all about the freakishly tall creatures behind us?" I mused, trying not to laugh at the fact he named his time machine 'Sexy'.

"LEFT. Actually, they're called. . ."

The Doctor's sentence was cut off as I made a swift pivot to the left, and then quickly driving into a small space in front of a side entrance to some small, beige warehouse. "Are they still following us?" I asked him calmly.

"Well, don't panic-" he began.

"So I should panic?"

"They're not still behind us, but they will be soon. The Bril lock on and target things, which means they always work for somebody else. You came in a bit late, so I've already figured most of this out. They're working for these things called the Daleks." When I gave him a questioning look, he just waved it off. "Don't worry about them. Anyways, I have this handy-dandy little thing that helps me out in these kind of situations."

He began to search his jacket, and I stared at him, waiting. There was a long, awkward silence as he fumbled through his jacket. "There it is!"

He pulled out of his jacket three identical silver disks that looked like nothing more than, well, aluminum disks. He handed two to me, and continued his spiel.

"These things work magic. Well, if you can get up close and personal with your enemies. You put one on the life form you want gone, and pre-program them to the coordinates of where you want them to go. Simple, but effective. When I press the button on top of this one," he tapped the top of the disk in his hand, which I now noticed had a button, "they teleport to the coordinates I've set. The disks and anything attached to them, that is."

"That's pretty handy, you're right."

When he didn't respond immediately, I hesitantly asked the question I didn't really want the answer to. "What's the catch?"

"Since I'm a Time Lord, they can sense me more easily than they can sense you. I'd never be able to get these on them without them noticing me. So, I kind of need you to do it."

I gave him a skeptical look, but didn't outright reject him. "And when you teleport them, where are you moving them to?"

"Many, many, galaxies away. I've never actually been to where they're going, but I hear it's nice."

"Good to know," I muttered sarcastically. "So how do you plan on me doing this?"

"They're still on our tail. They've probably gotten lost, not a good sense of direction, Bril, but their path will straighten out eventually. I need you to, when they get here, be hiding. Then you're going to jump out and put one on one's leg as they look for us. They're kind of oblivious, so if you do it quickly, you can get the other one too."

-

Ten minutes later, I found myself hiding in a bush. The Doctor was inside, waiting for me to get the disks onto the aliens. I had already been crouching in the hot leaves for five minutes and I was about ready to straighten up and stretch, but then I saw their car. 

They were hissing again, which was pretty creepy. As they got out of their car, I took a deep breath, trying to focus. I thought of the simple directions the Doctor had given me.

1. Hide in bush.

2. Wait for aliens to come.

3. When they come, run and put disks on their legs.

4. Run.

He added the last step after telling me there would be a gigantic flash of light that, if I watched it, would blind me for the rest of my life. So I preferred running for my life rather than trying desperately to cover my eyes in hopes of not being blinded or partially blinded. 

Then they began walking up to the warehouse. It was time. I let out one last puff of air. Finally, I sprinted out, sticking the first disk (which automatically attached) to the one closest to me's leg. I could practically hear the Mission Impossible theme music. Swiftly as I could, I then shoved the other one clumsily onto the twig-like leg of the other. As fast as I could, I ran for dear life into the warehouse, where I saw the Doctor pushing a big red button and smiling. 

"For once there's a big red button," he said to himself.

He pressed the button with his right thumb, and I put my hand over my eyes.

After a few seconds, I heard him speak up. "It's okay. They're gone."

I reluctantly took my hand from my face and excitedly high-fived myself. It looked like I was clapping, but it didn't matter to me. "Yes!"

Without thinking, I hugged the Doctor. It was just kind of awkward for a second before we both pulled away. "Ahem," he cleared his throat.

"So. . .what do we do now?"

"Oh, it's not what we do. It's what I do. I'll be back though, but got to go!" The man winked at me before beginning to walk away, deeper into the warehouse. Well that was abrupt, I thought to myself.

"Wait!" I called after him, my voice echoing into the warehouse. "When will you be back?" I didn't want to sound desperate, but I wanted him to tell me if he was going to just leave for another month and a half.

The Doctor strolled back to where I still stood, giving me a knowing smile. "Soon enough," and my source of adventure turned and strolled away.

The last thing I heard before defeatedly leaving the structure and getting back in the SUV was the wheezing of a machine, one I would be very familiar with sooner than I knew.