hurt // obikin au [on hold]

e i g h t

anakin wakes up confused. someone's body is behind his, their arms wrapped around his waist, face nuzzled into the back of his neck. he's warm, but not uncomfortably so, and finds himself not wanting to move. his eyes droop shut again.

"anakin?" the voice is soft, masculine. anakin's eyes snap open.

"i forgot," he says in a sleepy voice. he wriggles a little and obi-wan releases his hold on him. he stretches a little, and then looks over at obi-wan. 

"what?" obi-wan questions. "why are you staring at me?"

anakin just shrugs, switches his gaze to the comforter. he wants so badly to discuss the confusion he's feeling with padmé.

"hey," obi-wan says gently. "are you okay? can you tell me that?"

anakin swallows. "i'm okay," he whispers. "i guess you are a good cuddler, huh? i don't even remember falling asleep."

"told you," obi-wan says cheekily. he hasn't moved from the position he woke up in. his gaze flutters over anakin, and it's very fond. he's even cuter at waking up somehow. 

"shut up," anakin responds, yawning. "let me up, obi-wan. i have to pee."

"it's really weird to have you not insulting me," obi-wan says as he moves out of anakin's way. "i'm not used to talking to you without my incredible wit."

"shut up," anakin says again, grabbing his toothbrush and toothpaste and leaving the room. he's brushing his teeth at the sink when obi-wan walks in, and he avoids his gaze. his face feels oddly warm. he quickly spits in the sink and rinses his toothbrush and hurries back to their room. "what is wrong with me?" he mumbles to himself, running a hand through his messy hair. something feels different and he's not sure of what it is.

"you're acting weird," obi-wan says suspiciously when he walks back in the room. when anakin looks up, he sees obi-wan staring at him with narrowed eyes.

"what? n-no, i'm not," anakin stammers, which alone is weird for him.

"yes, you are." obi-wan steps closer, and the proximity makes anakin swallow hard. "are you falling for me?"

"what?" anakin sputters. the question catches him off guard for a minute. "me? fall for you?" he rolls his eyes. "in your dreams, obi-wan."

"more like in yours." he has a shit-eating grin on his face.

anakin raises an eyebrow. "...what do you mean?"

"you said my name in your sleep last night."

"probably because i was dreaming about murdering you," anakin responds, but he's blushing. he awkwardly uses his right hand to scratch his left cheek in an attempt to hide it.

"you're blushing," obi-wan says. there's a smile in his voice, and anakin wants to punch him again. "fuck, if that isn't pretty."

"fuck off," anakin mutters. he goes to push past him, but obi-wan catches him by the wrists. his face has gone very solemn all of a sudden, and anakin can't help but stare in surprise.

"why are you fighting this so hard?"

"fighting what?" anakin responds.

"how you feel. it's not bad." obi-wan's thumb is gently tracing anakin's inner wrist, gentle, just there. running tiny circles into his skin.

"i don't feel anything." anakin wants so badly to believe that.

obi-wan stares at him with a leveled stare. "we both know that's not true, sweetheart."

those damned pet names again. anakin wills himself not to go red, but it doesn't work, and he lowers his head. 

"i can't," he finally whispers.

"you can't what?"

"be gay," anakin exhales. it feels like everything is rushing out of him, like it's a secret he's kept for far too long. maybe it is.

"you don't have to be. you don't have to have a label if you don't want to. or you could be bi, or pan, or...or anything, really. it's okay." obi-wan is gentle, soothing. "i promise it's not as big of a deal as you're making it."

anakin just shakes his head. he doesn't know what to say, and his throat is all thick and achy. 

"it's okay," obi-wan says again. anakin squeezes his eyes shut tighter. then, surprising the hell out of both of them, anakin inches closer, fits his cheek in the muscly bit between obi-wan's shoulder and his neck. he smells good, and he's warm, and anakin inches the rest of his body closer. it takes obi-wan a solid ten seconds to realize that anakin is initiating being held despite his dislike of being touched, and he slowly wraps his arms back around him. anakin makes a small, happy sound that obi-wan knows he should never, ever mention. "it's gonna be just fine."

and it's not everything obi-wan could've wanted, but it's a start, and he doesn't mind baby steps.