soccer jin

feb. 1

I tapped my foot to the ticking of the class clock.
30 minutes left.
I can never focus in this class. the ticking of the clock, the sound of the pencils working & dropping, the sound of my own heart beating and my body taking a breath made my mind jumble.
I felt a light tap on my shoulder from behind me.
I jumped out of my thoughts, "are you going to the soccer game tonight?" my friend Noelle asked. "no," I said giving her a look, she knew that I didn't go to school events. I continued. "why?"
"because I want you to come with me. I think it'll be fun. This is your junior year. You have to live a little before we graduate." She answered. She was right. Since freshman year I was never interested in school events or clubs. I was always anti social and never had many friends, but doing things outside of school was just not my thing. "I don't know, that's really not my thing. Also who would I even talk to?" She hit my arm and started lightly giggling. "Me dummy." The loud ding of the class bell interrupted our laughter and we both immediately jumped up and walked with our books in our hands down to our locker. "Elora, come on! Please come!" Noelle begs as I head down the school hallway to get to my locker. "Noelle, I don't know.." I trail off still walking steadily to the hallways that leads to my locker. "Girl, please! You never come and I have a huge crush on one of the players." My stomach drops as those words leave her mouth. I've had the biggest crush on senior soccer player Jin since forever. No one knows. Not even Noelle. I put in the digits to my locker, opening the door and shoving my books into my backpack. Noelle continues "Jackson is so hot" she whispers kind of hiding behind her books as she says it. A wave of relief washes over me as I zip my bag and throw it over my shoulders. "Elora, come on. You don't ever show interest in boys. Maybe if you go out more, you'll get asked to prom!" She says with hope oozing in her words. I laugh louder than I wanted to, shaking my head and continuing down the hall. "Noelle, no one is going to ask me to prom because I go out one time." I snicker. She giggles "so is that a yes? Are you gonna come. My mom will drive! You can stay over tonight too!" She says with the biggest smile. She's so gorgeous. Noelle has long brown hair, fair skin, and hazel eyes. I can't help but soften and finally agree. "Okay... I'll run home and get dressed." I say giving in to her pleas. "Yes!" She says jumping up at my words. A slight flush appears on her cheeks as she realizes I'm really going to come this time. "TEXT ME!!" She yells down the hall as I walk backwards towards the doors to leave our school. I give her the okay hand signal and push the doors ajar. I'm met with cool wind and the smell of cigarettes. My converse basically slapping the ground as I head towards my house. My thoughts still jumbled from school. I pull out my phone and plug in my headphones. I try to drown the thoughts out with some music before I get too anxious. I can't believe I actually agreed to go to a soccer game. I made a decision that before junior year comes, I'm going to make some changes. Be more outgoing. And I guess I'm finally starting to hold myself to those expectations. I tug at my backpack straps as I pick up the pace to my house. I'm almost there. I live pretty close to the school and everyday at around this time I see Jin at the convenience store around the corner from my house. He always buys a juice box. And like clock work, Jin steps out of the convenience store, plucking the straw into the top of the juice box; taking a sip and heading back into the direction of our school. I try to shake the nerves again. Jin and I have gone to the same school all of our lives. Even though he's a grade above me, we somehow managed to always be around each other. Never shared a conversation though. I don't think he's ever even looked at me before. I make a left down my street and feel my phone buzz in my back pocket of my jeans.

IMessage

NoNo 🫧:
What are you gonna wear girly?
Me:
Omg.. I didn't even think about that
Me:
What do you even wear to a soccer game
Me:
NOELLE WHAT AM I GONNA WEAR
NoNo🫧:
When you get home, show me some options. Cute but relaxed. Don't stress! You got this

As I read the texts I feel my palms get clammy, I open my front door and immediately go to my room to look through my closet. Taking pictures and sending them to Noelle.
First option is too casual, second option is too dressy, third option doesn't match, fourth option is not going to keep me warm. I'm about to give up when suddenly I get an idea.
I snap a pic and send it to Noelle.

Me: okay what about this

NoNo🫧:
Um YES
NoNo🫧:
girl
NoNo🫧:
Yessss 😝🙏🏻
Me:
I was about to give up 😫
NoNo🫧:
we will pick you up in an hour! 🫶🏻

I read the message and start packing my bag. Before going to tell my mom I'll be staying with Noelle tonight. It's a weekend tomorrow so I know she won't care. "Hey mom." I say as I step into her room. "I'm gonna stay at Noelle's house tonight." I say again softy watching my mom look up from the television. "Okay." Is all she says. "And I'm going to the soccer game tonight." I say fidgeting with my hands. This catches her attention and she turns the volume down on the TV. "Elora, that's great." Her eyes soften. My mom and I don't have a close relationship but we love each other. "I hope you have fun." She continues before smiling and then turning her head back to the TV. I walk out of her room and take a quick shower before I change into my clothes and pack a light snack. My phone pings but I already know it's Noelle. I don't even look at my phone and head out the door with a simple, loud, "bye mom!" Before heading down my steps and into Noelle's mom's car. Noelle is beaming at me from the passenger seat as I settle into the back. Her mom and her are like best friends. Her mom isn't strict at all and they chat like they're the same age. Noelle is wearing simple ripped skinny jeans and a read sweatshirt. "You look hot" Noelle says. "Shut up." I am rolling my eyes as i say it. Noelle's mom looks back at me in the rearview mirror. "No you seriously look great Elora." Her mom says with a smile. I ignore the compliments as the anxiety settles in that we are about to be at the school attending the soccer game. Noelle seems unbothered. Noelle, even though she's like me in the sense that she keeps to herself and doesn't have many friends; she's a lot more involved than I am. She's had boyfriends and she is in a book club. She participates in class and talks to random people in the hallway just to give them a compliment, even if they're not friends with each other. She's been to parties. I'm pretty sure she's even thrown parties too.
We pull into the parking lot of the school and Noelle jumps out. I follow with my bag in my hand. "Bye mom! Game ends at 9" she says strutting towards the soccer fields. I'm still silent and she notices that something is wrong. "Girl breathe." She says in a joking tone while she puts her hand on my bag hinting to me that she's supporting me. I take a deep breath and look ahead of us at the student lining the bleachers. One more deep breath as I walk through the grass to find a spot for Noelle and I to sit. Noelle grabs my shoulder. "Actually..." she chimes in with a smirk on her face. "I was thinking we stay down here near the field so we can look at the boys better" she finishes with the smirk still plastered on her face. I shrug. At least we'll be away from the people in the bleachers.