It Takes Two To Tango

Chapter Twenty Three

Quickly opening the car door, I race out, running straight up to my dad joyfully, sure that this is the perfect ending to an amazing day.

Then I see that he’s bending down to pick up a box, piled high with various bits and bobs: all of his things.

‘Oh.’ I step back, not sure what to think, or say, or do.

My dad turns, and seeing me, puts down the box, opening his arms out to hug me. Tentatively, I walk into his arms, feeling almost as if he’s a stranger.

‘Are you coming back?’ I ask him, my voice cracking a little as I try to get rid of the lump in my throat.

He sighs, and that tells me everything. I pull away, and he picks up his box. I see a framed picture of Molly and I poking out the top, and bite my lip. Is he really going for good?

‘I’ll see you later, Kyra,’ he tells me, and walks over to his car, popping the box down with a few others in the boot.

I stand there, watching him leave, feeling as if my legs would cave in if someone wasn’t there with their arms around my waist, keeping me up. I turn, suddenly, not having noticed Jude slip up behind me, somehow knowing exactly what I needed, and exactly how to provide it.

I end up turning into his chest, and he wraps his arms around me properly, fitting them perfectly, rubbing up and down as I sigh heavily, resting my head against the perfectly toned contours of his chest.

I don’t know how long we stood there for, but it was long enough for me to relax against him, enjoying the warmth of his body against mine. I hoped he didn’t feel that my heartbeat increased dramatically when he began rubbing tiny circles across my lower back.

When I finally pull back, he bends his head to look me in the eyes properly. ’You okay, gorgeous?’ he asks, brushing some random strands of hair out of my eyes for me. The care he shows sends my heart racing all over again, and I suddenly find it hard to find words. The powerful gaze of his eyes seems to take every last bit of me in, and I feel as if I could tumble quite easily into the depths of them.

‘I guess… I guess it just hit me that he probably really isn’t coming back now,’ I murmur, looking away from those beautiful eyes. Jude nods as if that makes perfect sense.

I look back up, and see nothing but concern in his eyes. ‘Thank you, Jude,’ I tell him, meaning every word.

‘Don’t mention it,’ he tells me, guiding me through my own front door, one hand resting against my back.

For a moment, we both pause on the threshold, but I decide to take charge for once, and tug him inside with me, asking if he wants anything to drink.

‘I’m fine,’ he replies.

‘Ah.’ I can’t think of anything to say, and it doesn’t help that he’s smiling so gorgeously at me at the moment. ‘I’m sorry,’ I tell him, with a cautious smile back. ‘I’ve been a bit dramatic about this whole thing, I-’

‘I was exactly the same as you were,’ Jude interrupts. ‘If not worse. Don’t apologise, Foxy, it’s completely understandable.’

He rubs my arm gently as I smile up at him. ‘You’ve been such a help, Jude, you really have.’

‘What can I say?’ he responds, with a cheeky smile. ‘I’m just a naturally helpful person.’

I laugh at that, sticking my tongue out at him.

He glances at his watch. ‘I’d better go- are you okay now? I can stay if you want me?’

‘Want you? Don’t flatter yourself,’ I tease him, but as he pulls me into a hug, telling me to ring him if I want to talk at any time, even if it‘s the middle of the night, I know that I do want him, very much so.
 
Even after he’s gone, driven away into the darkening night, I still feel the warmth of his arms around me and know that I‘ve never wanted anyone more than I want him. Looking down, I realise that I’m still wearing his leather jacket, and I smile. I don’t think I’ll be taking this off for quite some time yet.

*
My guess was right- I end up wearing the jacket to school the next day, under the pretence of giving it back to Jude during the day.

When I get into Jessie’s car first thing in the morning, I see her lips twitch as she realises what I’m wearing, but she doesn’t say anything.

‘How are you and Josh getting along, then?’ I ask her, as Jessie sets off.

Jessie’s face lights up at the mention of her boyfriend, and she smiles at me, her eyes bright.

‘I love being in a relationship with him so much, Ky,’ she tells me, excitedly. ‘He’s just so sweet to me.’

‘Aww,’ I reply. ‘You two look so smitten with each other all the time,’ I tell her, and it’s true. They’re barely ever away from each other, always sat together at lunch, smiling at each other foolishly.

Jessie scrunches up her nose, glancing at me and then back at the road. ‘I can see why people like being in relationships now,’ she says, with a rueful smile. ‘Before it was always such a disappointment.’

I nod in agreement. Every boyfriend I’ve ever had has never quite fulfilled the role I’d expected. It’s either been awkward, or I’ve realised too late that I never should have entered into the relationship in the first place, because the boy in question and I didn’t suit at all.

But it was different with Jude. Okay, so I shouldn’t have entered the relationship, but I’m starting to wonder if Jude and I do suit after all.

I gaze out of the window, wistfully, feeling the warmth of the early morning sun through the glass.

I could quite easily be very good friends with Jude, I realise now. That day yesterday was one of the most relaxed of my life, and our senses of humour seem to match, now that he isn’t trying to hit on me every five seconds.

‘But how about you and Jude?’ Jessie asks me, slyly.

I glance over at her, sharply. She doesn’t look back at me, deliberately focusing on the road.

‘We’re getting along a bit better,’ I say, slowly, yet as carelessly as I can, as if it really doesn’t matter to me what my status with Jude is.

‘Mm?’ Jessie asks. I know her well, this is how she always plays it- uninterested, hoping that way I’ll spill more of the juicy details. Not that there are any juicy details for spilling.

‘He’s toned down the flirting a bit,’ I add, unable to just leave it there, and Jessie raises an eyebrow.

‘Is that a good thing?’ she asks, teasingly.

I nod furiously. ‘Of course it is! He’s actually not so bad. Well, when he puts his mind to it.’

‘Kyra!’ Jessie turns to look at me. ‘Not so bad?’

I shrug. ‘Yeah?’

Jessie merely smiles as she effortlessly manoeuvres around the roundabout, the little clicking noise of the indicator the only sound.

‘What?!’ I ask her, the tensions driving me mad.

‘Sounds like you’re falling for him, Ky, like every other girl in the school,’ she tells me, smoothly.

‘Falling for him? Me?’ I protest, but I know I’m lying. She’s right. I catch myself thinking that far too often- I can’t be falling for Jude, I can’t be. I told him I just wanted to be friends, I can’t secretly want to be more and mess him around like that.

‘Yes, you,’ Jessie pulls into her usual parking spot, and turns off the ignition. ‘No, scrap that, I think you’ve fallen already.’

I shake my head, unable to think of words to respond to that with. Maybe I have already fallen? What if I have? How do I get back up?!

‘Oh Ky,’ Jessie must be able to see the truth in my eyes, because she leans over, putting an arm around my shoulders. ‘It’s true, isn’t it?’

‘I don’t know!’ I cry, pitifully. ‘I just… oh, I don’t know at all. It all feels so right  when I’m with him, but…’

‘But you’ve already tried a relationship?’ Jessie puts in, helpfully.

I nod. ‘And that went down the plughole, so another attempt seems futile. But I find myself thinking about it- mulling it over- all the time. What would happen if we tried it again?’

‘There’s no way of telling,’ Jessie answers, sagely. ‘The only way to know is to try it out.’

I twist a strand of hair around one finger as I contemplate this. No. I could never specifically start talking to Jude about what went wrong between us, not seeing as we’ve just started to get close as friends. Not when the competition is getting closer, and my parent’s marital problems are still looming over us like a rain heavy cloud, pregnant with the anticipation of a storm on the horizon.

I sigh, resting my head in my hands. ‘I don’t know, Jess. I think I’ll have to just wait and see.’

‘It’s probably best,’ she tells me. ‘You don’t want to make the same mistake twice-  rushing in too quickly.’

‘Exactly,’ I say, and as I look over at Jessie’s face, seeing the concern in her eyes, I smile gratefully at her. ‘Thanks, lovely,’ I tell her, sincerely.

‘Thanks for what? I’ve been a terrible friend recently, all absorbed in Josh. Don’t ever let me do that again.’

‘Don’t say that!’ I protest, surprised by her serious expression. ‘It’s completely understandable. I’d probably be the same, if I were-’

‘No, Ky,’ Jessie interrupts. ‘You’re always there for me, even when I’m not there for you, and I’m sorry I haven’t been paying more attention to you.’ With a little sigh, she bites her lower lip and looks back at me. ’I’ve been a crap friend, but I’m going to try my best to be a whole deal better to you, you deserve far better than me, sweetie.’

Suddenly, I feel close to tears, and reach over to hug my beautiful best friend. ‘Jessie, you’re the best friend I could ever ask for. Never, ever feel bad about things like that anymore.’

‘Okay,’ she replies, with a wan little smile, and then we both look at each other, watery eyed, and laugh at our emotional expressions. Getting out of the car, the sun seems to be shining a great deal brighter, and the grass seems a far fresher shade of green. Linking my arm through Jessie’s, we both walk into the school with smiles on our faces, and I feel suddenly as if I can face the world with now both Jude and Jessie caring about me.

I brush away the thought that I’d like Jude to care for me in a slightly different way, but it lingers at the back of my head, never quite vanishing from my mind. Because I think I am falling, falling faster and faster, without even the slightest parachute to slow me down. And the thing is, I just don’t know if Jude’s going to be there at the bottom to catch me.