Die With You

First story. I would love to hear what you think.

Merry Christmas everyone, even if that means the Doctor will die.

Maca

-:-:-:-

There was sadness in the universe. It was seen in the planets, in the stars and in the dust. It was felt in the different beings that inhabited every inch of the cosmos. Even if they didn't understand the feeling, they knew that something tremendous was happening and they had the need to be respectful with the unknown event.

Little did they know that in that moment someone was dying. Someone who had saved the worlds so many times that he had lost count. The universe was mourning the Doctor without knowing he was fading.

Far in the sky and close to the Aquarius constellation, the TARDIS was crying because inside her his mad Time Lord was about to use his regeneration energy to heal himself before dying forever. She knew that every end was also a beginning but no for that the death of the Doctor was less important.

The Doctor knew that and it was the reason of the pain he was feeling instead of just let it happen. He wanted to have the chance to be him for a little longer before saying goodbye. Because he would be another man after regenerating: a new face, a new body, new manner but the same feelings. Even thought he knew that this incarnation was the one who felt in love with Clara. He tried to deny it to himself but it was impossible. Every time he chose someone to travel with, he fell in love.

He loved humans, so different between each other but so emotionally similar. And his Clara wasn't the exception. Even if he tried to deny it, now it was crystal clear. She was the one who had blown into the world to save him and he couldn't be more grateful for having her by his side. If he had to die he was glad that Clara was there holding his hand.

"Doctor, stop doing this!" requested Clara whilst she closed the distance between them. "I've seen all of your faces and I know what is going to happen now. That poison hasn't killed you yet because you are delaying the process," she added alarmed and sat beside him on the TARDIS floor.

The Doctor smiled at her. She didn't understand. His Clara was too selfless to understand that he was a selfish man.

He wanted to contemplate his impossible girl one last time with those eyes, with the eyes of the man who was in love. She was his Clara and for as long he could be with her he was going to fight, even if he had to fight himself. He wouldn't allow that his future man would be the one to tell her about his feelings. No random bloke would have that privilege.

"My sweet and perfect Clara" he sighed and held her hand. "I just want to be the one who will promise you the future," Clara tilted her head without understanding the meaning of his words whilst the Doctor started to stroke the back of her hand. "I won't promise forever because even forever has an end, but I promise you that as long as I'll live you will be in my hearts."

Clara's eyes were watering and her face draw a sad smile. "I know that Doctor, but you could have told me that after regenerating, I know you are in pain now," she hugged him impatient.

"No, Clara. I want to be the one who says how important you are to me, because even if he will be me and I will still feel the same I don't know how I will act or talk or move. Even I don't know if I will think that bow ties are cool, which you know they are." Clara ended the hug and smiled at that. "And maybe you won't like me and I don't know what is going to happen if you won't like me." His face showed how scared he was and Clara noticed that.

"Chin boy, I will always like you. I have always liked you with every face of yours as I can always see you in those big sad eyes." He didn't realised but a tear was falling through his face. "Now it's time, you know," Clara whispered holding his hands. "You have to let it go, I won't go anywhere"

"It's time!" the Time Lord said with false enthusiasm as he stood up. "You have to move. You know with all the goldy thing."

Clara kissed the Doctor's cheek and walked away to a safe distance, far from the TARDIS console. The Doctor sighed and looking at Clara's brown eyes he said, "run you impossible girl, and remember me."

With those words a gold blaze appeared and Clara felt how her heart pounded.