3 AM thoughts

Anxiety

Anxiety is the constant feeling of fear. Fear that you're not pretty enough,
or funny enough,
or good enough.
I used to call it stage fright until it was more.
I would get scared to talk to my friends or even leave my house.
When doing a simple act like saying hello to a friend isn't very simple. Although it is only one word,
it causes your mind to wonder if they like you and that makes your question if anyone does.
You feel your heart pacing faster that your feet when you go for a run so your can weigh less than your friend that's you're certain thinks you're ugly.
While playing with the rings you have on your hand,
you wonder if there will ever be a special ring on a certain finger.
You silently question why anyone would ever marry you and with that in mind, you question your relationship. 
Wondering if he ever regretted being with you or had thought of being with another person.
But of course no one questions if you're okay because you hide all your insecurities under a smile you wear until you're alone.