Never be the same (Bucky Barnes/The Winter Soldier)

Chapter 35

"The best kind of humans are the ones who stay." -R.M Drake

It was our second day in our "new home" and I was already completely bored with the place. The only rooms I visited were mine and Bucky's, which didn't really give me much to do. I wasn't sure about going downstairs during the day out of fear that I might bump into somebody. So I was trying to steer clear of that as long as I possibly could, even though my stomach had been rumbling for a while now.

It was interesting to look around the house last night, I wasn't denying that. Though the house was too huge to see everything and going hand in hand with my little fear I wasn't too keen on the idea of stumbling upon some random person's bedroom either.

"I'm tired," I moaned into one of Bucky's pillows, making him laugh lightly, "and hungry too."

"Well, maybe you should have slept last night instead of stalking around the house," he poked my sides.

I slapped his hands away and turned myself over to look at him, "Look who's talking!" I exclaimed before adding, "also you didn't help with my second problem."

"I can't help with that," he sighed, "I'm hungry too."

I nodded and hugged one of the pillows close to my chest, hoping it would muffle the sounds coming from my stomach. Bucky was looking through the various drawers in the room and I was looking at him, wondering whether I should ask him the question that had been bothering me since yesterday or let it just slide. I finally decided on the first option.

"I never asked what you went to get from our place?"

"The backpack," he answered simply while nodding towards the corner of the room where another dresser stood.

I looked towards the corner for a moment before belting out of the bed to the dresser and finding the backpack inside it. I had forgotten about it completely. This backpack was the most important thing that we possessed since it held all of the memories that we remembered so far. Which to say was quite a lot by now, since I had already pieced together most of my past, though there were pits and pieces still missing, I was happy with how much there was there already, and honestly speaking, I sometimes thought that it was as good as it was gonna get.

* * *

Rogers brought us some dinner and offered to show us the house, which I quickly yet quite politely declined. I had seen most of the house already, not that he knew of our late night/early morning adventures. He also did want us to meet some other people who were living in the house, but we just decided that we would like to spend today just getting used to it all, so he left us alone.

It was 1 am now and I finally decided to climb into my large bed. I got proof of how tired I was as soon as my head hit the pillow and I was out.

"Here's your new mission, Miss Darkness." Rumlow gave me another folder and just kept standing in front of me as if expecting me to gaze at it right then and there.

I obeyed him quickly like I knew I was supposed to. I flipped the front cover of the folder to find out my next mission. Male. 38 years old. Has a family. Nothing seemed out of ordinary about the guy until I got to his name. Michael Leveston.

I looked up at Rumlow puzzled, "Michael Leveston? Why does the name ring a bell? Do I know him?"

Rumlow seemed pleased with me, but then he suddenly shook his head and shrugged at me, "Who knows?" but before he walked away, I could see his usual smirk grow even bigger, "Maybe you did. In another life." he laughed really close to my ear and stomped away.

Then everything faded to black and without another moment to process the scene I was taken to another place.

"You're gonna do fine in there," Soldier sighed as we got closer and closer to our target, "Just don't trip in there and try to avoid the other people in there, even when they approach you." his jaw clenched as he spoke the last part.

"Why would they?" I rolled my eyes as Soldier lend me a hand to help me out of the car.

Soldier's eyes ran up and down my body before he finally sighed and looked me in the eyes, "Why wouldn't they?"  his eyebrows rose slightly as he looked away from me.

I felt a twinge in my heart as I looked down at myself. I was made to wear a dress to infiltrate the party without making myself stand out too much.

"I'm just gonna get what we need and get out." I said quietly before turning away from him.

However before I could make another step towards the house, I felt him pull me back by my arm to face him, "I'll be watching you from up there, alright?" he nodded towards the roof of another building, "And you uh- you look great." he whispered the last part so quickly that I almost missed it.

I was surprised by the compliment but felt more confident than ever before about a mission. I thanked him quickly before going after the stuff Mister Leveston had stolen from Hydra.

And again the memory faded away as another scenario took its place.

"Who's that?" I pointed at a man on the picture.

Cindy stopped packing to look up for a moment as I showed her the picture. Her face obviously lit up at the sight of him. She zipped her bag up and put it on the chair next to her before answering.

"That's my uncle. Uncle Michael."

The scream that left my mouth after that was loud enough to wake the entire house in my personal opinion and I was proven right as I saw the light switch on from the corridor. My door opened and in ran a few people, none of who I recognised though.

I was pretty sure Wilson and Rogers were there, but I knew there were more. Though Bucky wasn't there. I was struggling to catch my breath. I couldn't stop screaming and crying on my bed. I hated being vulnerable in front of others.

"Adriana?!" Rogers came close to me, not knowing what to do, "What's wrong Adriana?" Rogers' hand came in contact with my shoulder and I flinched immediately and scooted away from him.

I wanted them to leave me alone. I didn't want any of them here. I didn't want to cry and scream. I wanted to be able to breathe normally. I wanted to be able to sleep without a worry in the world. I didn't want to be who I was.  I wanted every aspect of my life to vanish like a bad dream. I wanted Bucky.

"Bucky." I kept whispering. I couldn't stop repeating his name. I only wanted him.

Suddenly two strong arms were wrapped around my body and my stiff body finally felt at ease, at least enough to let myself collapse completely between his arms. He was my safe place, there was no denying that.

"Adriana, doll, I'm here." Bucky whispered into my hair, "I'm here. I'll always be here."

I grabbed a hold of him and buried my face in his chest to cover it from the other people who were still standing in the room. His arms pulled me closer than I thought physically possible.

"Bad dream?" he kept whispering as he started combing his fingers through my hair.

"I'm a horrible person, Bucky." I cried to his chest.

He shushed me as soon as I said that, "No, you're not. The world has just been a horrible place for someone as good you." He couldn't be more wrong.

"Please don't let me go."

"Never."