{ON HOLD} Where My Loyalties Lie (Vanoss Crew Fanfic)

Chapter 20

I stood there, numbly staring at Lui. "What?" I asked disbelievingly. No, I thought desperately, I got him home safe. He has to be okay.

Lui shook his head and said sadly, "I'm sorry man. His lung's punctured, and without the proper equipment, which we don't have," he added, "I can't treat it. Plus, I don't have the expertise or the experience to treat a punctured lung. I'm sorry but... he's a goner." Lui turned back to take a look at Bobby who was still lying on the table with his eyes closed. "To be honest, it's a goddamn miracle that he's made it this long."

Haley snapped out of her trance and stormed over to Lui. She grabbed him by the front of his shirt and hysterically screamed, "Don't say that! He'll be fine! He'll be fine. He'll be fine..." She sobbed as she sank to her knees, letting go of Lui. "He'll be fine..."

I walked over, and crouched down next to her and silently pulled her into a hug. Even though I was the cause of the news, she accepted my embrace and cried into my shoulder as I slowly rocked her back and forth. Lui awkwardly stood behind her, looking at us with a defeated look on his face. "Lui," I said quietly, "you did your best. Go ahead and wait outside." It wasn't you that failed, I inwardly thought, it was I who failed Bobby. The shorter man hesitated before giving a small nod and walked out the door, closing it behind him; his hands left crimson streaks on the door and the handle.

My fault.

Bobby coughed again, and I looked up to see him glance over at Haley and I. "So," he rasped, "I'm going to die, huh?"

"Shut the fuck up." I stood up and helped Haley up as well. She strode over and stood next to the table, holding Bobby's hand tight in her own. The other hand came up to stroke his hair that had been matted down onto his blood and sweat streaked forehead. I occupied the spot next to her, looking down at Bobby.

"For once," Haley whispered, "I agree with Vanoss. Be quiet Bobby. I just want to enjoy our last few moments together." She gave him a hard look, as if she were challenging him to contradict her.

Bobby ignored our requests. "No, I have a few things I have to say to you guys... before I go." He coughed and tried to prop himself up on his elbows, groaning in pain. I went to go and steady him, but he waved me off, pushing himself up until he was sitting up. He sat there breathing deeply for a moment before he continued, "First of all, Vanoss-"

"No," I cut him off. If he was going to die, then he at least deserved to know the real identity of the man who had failed him in protecting, "it's not Vanoss. That's not my real name. My real name is Evan." I gave him a small smile, although it felt a bit strained; if he was going to lose his life today, he at least should have some comfort in who's going to protect his girlfriend. I glanced over at Haley, who I knew was listening but refused to look at me. I didn't really care at this point whether or not she knew my real name. Code names didn't really get me anywhere nowadays.

"Okay then, Evan," Bobby continued, clutching his chest, "don't beat yourself up because of this, it wasn't your fault." Bobby coughed, and more blood spewed out of his mouth. "There was no way in hell you could've known that he was aiming for me, and you carried me all the way home with a wounded shoulder." He gave me a tight lipped smile and put a reassuring hand on my good shoulder. "You did all that you could. Thank you."

Too overcome with emotion, I could barely give him a nod in response. Even though I had failed him, Bobby had still forgiven me; that was more than I deserved from him. Satisfied with my response, Bobby turned his attention to Haley who had been watching our exchange in silence. "Haley," Bobby began, "don't blame Evan for this." Another fit of coughing came over him again, but this time the coughs had a more wet sounding quality. It was obvious that all this talking was taking a toll on him.