The Bullied Girl

Chapter 10 - Broken Hearts

"I can't understand you Marilyn," Bruce said as he sat with her for lunch. "I thought you'd be happy to see me.  I know what you said, but...I don't get it."

Bruce and Marilyn sat in the lunchroom for lunch. She was more than distressed, and he felt the same way.  

She struggled to answer him. She hoped he'd understand why she didn't want him transferring to her school. But she should have known better. She still didn't expect him to really get that transfer. Yet it was nice he did. How many boys would do what he just did? She could feel grateful for that. However she also felt smothered, and needed space. 

She was still haunted from the heartless bullying she had faced for so long, but she was still shaken by the way she snapped on Mildred. Sure, Mildred had asked for it. But it horrified Marilyn every time she remembered the way she slammed Mildred on that window. She'd been driven to do that and in school no less. A place where she had been sent to learn. By her parents because it's the law. How was bullying allowed in schools? How did it continue to go on? School should be a safe place for kids and teens to learn. Okay, so it wasn't perfect as no place ever was, but there was no excuse for the continued bullying she sometimes witnessed.

"Bruce...it's not that I'm not happy to see you. It's just that I need time." How could she tell him that he was crowding her without hurting his feelings? She couldn't tell him that so perhaps all she could do was put up with his transfer. Besides, he was already here. There was nothing else he could do except break up with him. Not that they were a couple or where they? Suddenly, she was confused. Of course they were a couple. 

"I'm sorry Marilyn. Maybe I wasn't thinking."

Marilyn placed her hand on his. "No, I'm the one whose sorry. Of course I'm happy you're here. It's just I don't want you to think I need protection. I'll be okay. That's all it is."

Bruce smiled weakly. He wanted to believe her. "Are you sure? We could have discussed this before, but we still can. We can discuss anything Marilyn, you know that."

Marilyn nodded. "Yes, I know." That was as much as she could admit for now. She was touched that Bruce would go through this transfer just to be at her side. But she felt torn. She was feeling very fond of him again, even as a part of her screamed. As much as she cared for him, she couldn't stop wondering if she'd been clinging to him for protection. Perhaps she'd been depending on him. And he wasn't helping.

"I have no problem defending you Marilyn," he said taking her hand. "Your safety is my concern." 

Marilyn pulled her hand away. "Maybe, but oh Bruce please. Can't you understand?" 

"Understand what? Marilyn, I care about you. I love you. Does that bother you so much? Oh never mind. I'll go back to our old school. It's obvious you're not happy about this. You're not happy about me coming here."

"It's not that. I just feel crowded and..."

Bruce looked stunned. "Crowded? I've been crowding you? I don't believe you. I'm crowding you. Goodbye Marilyn!" With that Bruce stormed away from the lunchroom before Marilyn could say anything. She started to chase him, but stopped as he started up the stairs. She hesitated as tears welled in her eyes. She hurt his feelings, and she hadn't meant to do that. And yet what else could she do? She couldn't back down now. Terrible as she felt she still needed her space. She only hoped she wouldn't bump into Bruce too much anymore. 

For the next couple of days Bruce avoided her. Marilyn would still see him in the halls, and she'd try to say hello, for she didn't see the problem with that, but he wouldn't even respond in kind. He'd stare at her, and keep walking. Whoa! Marilyn didn't expect that. Getting space was one thing, but being ignored was another. She was jolted! 

At lunch Bruce would walk away the moment her class came in.  By this time she was making a few friends, and it felt good. However, she still had a complex when people laughed around her, since she could never stop wondering if she was the target of their laughter.  She wasn't, but she could never be too sure. Even when people gestured nearby she'd panic. Anytime she saw this she'd quickly walk away never wanting to risk blowing up at anyone. It would be terribly embarrassing if she was wrong. She hated going through this. Maybe he should go back to therapy. Her mother gave her the choice to keep going, and her father felt that transferring would suffice, and she could move on now. She could put the bullying behind her. 

Marilyn tried. She diligently did her school work, but studying wasn't always easy. Still she managed to pass most of her quizzes and exams. But as days, and then weeks passed she became bewildered that Bruce could ignore her for this long. How could he? She knew she hurt him, but she didn't intentionally do that. But she could have handled it better couldn't she? 

She waited until the weekend. Bruce had even stopped calling her, and this really worried and confused her. She didn't want him to transfer to her school yet because she had felt smothered, but she hadn't been trying to get rid of him completely. Is that what he believed? If he did then he misunderstood her. Not that he gave Marilyn a chance to explain since he walked away without discussing anything with her.  And now this not talking to her. 

Reluctantly, she decided to call him. The phone rang like three times until she considered hanging up, but Bruce's mother finally answered. "Hello?" she asked. Marilyn had never met the woman. It'd been too soon in their relationship, and there'd been no time to discuss such a meeting. "May I speak to Bruce?" I asked. 

"Bruce? He's not home right now. He's on a date."

"A date?" Marilyn was stunned. "With who?"

"With who? Who am I speaking too?" Marilyn hesitated. "Nobody. Just a friend. I was just curious since he didn't mention anything about going out tonight." 

"Oh I see. Well, yes he's out with someone. Who should I say called him? He may have gone out with some Marilyn I think. He's always talking about her, as if she's been his steady. So who should I say called?" 

"Did he say he was going out with that Marilyn?"  

"What is this twenty questions?" Marilyn was taken aback. "I'll call him back." With that she hung up. The woman had an attitude.. But that didn't bother Marilyn as much as her thoughts.

She wasn't sure how to handle this, but come Monday she would confront Bruce whether she had a right to do so or not.