baby [h.s.]

thirty five

"Cheers New York." I said.

"Back to England we go." he said.

We loaded onto the plane and settled into our seats. Shortly after, the plane took off. Harry was asleep in minutes, but Riddle and I stayed awake.

We aimlessly spoke as the plane shot through clouds.

"It's not all that easy, you know." Riddle said, at one point. "You and Harry make it look so easy."

"We make what look so easy?" I said, quirking an eyebrow.

"Loving someone."

I felt like he had knocked the wind out of me. I cleared my throat.

"Uh, excuse me?"

Riddle half-grinned. "Don't act like you don't know what I'm talking about."

My brows furrowed. "Harry doesn't love me."

"So that means you love him?"

"I..." I said. "No, I don't think-"

Riddle laughed. "Tilly, have you ever even thought about it?"

I opened my mouth and closed it again. I hadn't. I had focused so much on shutting it out, on just not thinking about what was going on between us. I had made a point not to analyze.

My palms were clammy. I felt light-headed.

"We're not together." I said. "He doesn't love me. I don't love him."

"Who are you trying to convince here, Till?" Riddle said. "Me or yourself?"

I balled my hands into fists and sighed. My heart raced and I tapped my foot against the table in front of my seat.

"I can't." I said. "You're being ridiculous."

"Alright," he said. "If you say so. I'm going to sleep."

He stood and walked to the couch where he sprawled out. I chewed on my nails and avoided looking at him. When I stole a glance at Harry, I felt like I couldn't breathe.

I was scared.

I shoved headphones on my head and listened to music to avoid the rest of the plane ride. My mind shut down. I tried to keep my eyes closed to make it look like I was asleep.

When we arrived in London, I kept my headphones on. I was the first off of the plane and the first out of the car when it arrived at our flat. I had dodged Harry's attempts at conversation and sat as far away from him as I could.

I scurried to the back of the car and grabbed my bags before Harry could even fully get out of the car. I was halfway up the front stairs of our building when he called my name.

"Tilly!" he said. "Jesus, what's wrong?"

I shook my head. "Nothing, just quite tired."

"Want me to go pick up some dinner?"

I shifted my weight from one foot to the other and fiddled with my fingers.

"Oh, no, I'm good. Thanks though. Bye, Harry."

Before he could say anything else, I darted into the building. The wheels of my suitcase squeaked across the concrete floors and I jammed my finger on the elevator button. When it finally opened, I went inside and pressed the button for the doors to close as I watched Harry approach, waving his hand. His eyebrows furrowed and I just shrugged, as if it weren't my fault.

When the doors finally closed, I let out a long sigh. Then, for the first time in a while, I started to cry.

--

hey bitches i'm so sorry. i know i didn't update in forever. was going through rough times personally and i wasn't motivated to write. i didn't want to write a chapter just so i could get one out; i wanted to wait until i was actually inspired and it was well written and it was actually worth your time to read. so here.

also l o FUCKING l it's happening. y'all already know. here we go.

i love you guys so much, i have almost 130,000 reads. that's a lot of people with lots of eyes readings lots of chapters that i wrote. and that's insane. i love you all. thank you for all the feedback.

ALSO the song is above if you want to listen. "Welcome Home, Son" by Radical Face.

MUCH MUCH MUCH LOVE

becca xx