I pulled my shoes on and walked out with my clutch in hand as I took Ashton's hand softly as he spoke along the phone.
"Yes mate, we're leaving now... Yes.. Ok.. Bye." he hung up and kissed my temple, "Ready love?" Ashton asked as he eyed me up and down, I couldnt help the heat that rose to my feet. I nodded as he led me out the hotel room door and down to the lobby where we would be meeting up with the rest of the band.
I stood close to him as we greeted them, each one embracing me in a soft hug as I was complimented on how nicely I appeared to them. I thanked them and sighed slightly as my stomach churned due to slight hunger pains I gained every now and then.
We walked slowly as my mind fogged and I slightly lost my balance, but without the support of Ashton's arm around my waist I would have fallen and probably busted my skull open.
We all stepped into the van as fans yelled for them out of the hotel, I kept my head down and pulled my self out of Ashton's grip and to the front so no fans really noticed me as I quickly hopped into the middle row of our vehicle.
Ashton slid in next to me, automatically filling in the empty spaces between our fingers.
I looked at small videos on my phone, that were more like fast forward slideshows of a few pictures that made a flowing movement. My eyes sauntered over the video on the phone, it was when I had small cuts and different looking cuts along my thighs as I pulled an oversized sweatshirt up to show them, revealing my plain black underwear and my horrible legs that made me want to gag every time I saw them.
I let out a sigh, feeling Ashton's hand grab my phone and lock it before shoving it into his pocket so I wouldnt torture myself anymore.
"Dont torture yourself love.." he spoke softly, low enough for our ears to hear. I nodded as we pulled up to the fancy restaurant and got out, moving our way inside.
My stomach sent sharp pains as the aroma of food spread about the entire place, making me sick to my stomach.
We got seated rather quickly, retrieving what we wanted as drinks, I simply got ice cold water, and a mug of hot water to lower the screams of my stomach dying on the inside.
It obviously had its bad days, which I would consider this as one.
Everyone began ordering, and I panicked. I ordered the smallest salad they had and gave the excuse I wasnt that hungry. The four boys who knew my secret looked at me, I looked down at the table because their family members who tagged along on tour, along with the staff as well did not know.
I knew I would have to purge right after the calories filled my stomach, waiting to be captured and produce fat into my thighs and stomach.
I twiddled my thumbs, picked at my spilt ends, gnawed on my lip all till Ashton touched my knee to stop me from doing it all.
My small salad was placed in front of me and I swallowed the blockage that stayed put in the middle of my throat. Luke, Calum, Michael and Ashton were all staring at me.
I took my fork as I poked and prodded the cuisine. Stabbing into a green leaf drizzled with oil and vinegar.
I shoved the leaf into my mouth, cringing as my stomach became inflamed, wanting more of the meal.
I gripped Ashton's hand under the table as I forced the food down my throat. His thumb ran over my hand as he tried to comfort me as I forced the food into my unstable stomach. Once I finished I politely excused myself to the bathroom.
The boys' eyes were nervous because they were aware of what I had intended to do. I walked into the empty bathroom and went into the biggest stall, no even getting down before messily pulling my hair back and shoving my fingers to the familiar spot in my throat activating my gag reflexes and causing the burning feeling of vinegar to come up.
