Death Is My BFFLAD (Book Two Original Series)

Chapter 11: Scratch That

<---- Vote! Sorry for the long wait!

~No light, no light, in your bright blue eyes! I never knew dead alive could be so violent ~You can choose what stays and what fades away. ~And I'd do anything to make you stay. ~Would you leave me if I told you what I've done? 

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After taking three Tums for my irritating stomach ache, slipping on some soft cotton pajamas, getting my I-Pod, getting out my favorite movie, Titanic, and putting some ice in a towel, I readied myself for my first and possibly last afternoon in my apartment.

I lay on the couch with all my belongings and sat there, the DVD for Titanic on my chest, thinking about how miserable and depressed I was making myself. David Star? Man of the year? Abercrombie model? The man everyone in Chicago wanted to be, wanted to marry, and wanted to know? The man who's ego was the size of a planet, who's mouth spilled nothing but insults, and who's eyes mocked every step you took?

He didn't seem to be that kind of man.

Or was that just for me? Was I the butt of some secret joke? It just felt strange to me, strange that someone like David Star would be--putting aside the ludicrous thought of my Guardian Angel, my Boss, could be this 'amazing' person everyone wants to know. It brings me back to when Marcy and I use to circle people like him in our yearbooks every year and label 'Jerk-face' or draw crude pictures all over them. David Star would be that jerk face.

I had stooped low, so low that I had worked for that jerk in the yearbook I use to circle, the one that would play every girl in school and make them look bad, call them fat, made them feel worthless.

In the beginning of working at Devin & Co it was strictly out of curiosity. It was a once in a lifetime chance for a girl like me, straight out of high school with a beat up car and a laptop that ran on hamster wheels, to literally crash into the owner of an elite loan company. It was unlikely for me to get a handsome, professional looking man as my boss. It was unlikely to work for so much money, to be given an apartment in exchange for no lawsuits on my car damage Devin had cost me.

However, it was likely I wanted to press re-wind and undo all of my decisions. Undo my urge to be on the road that day at that time, undo my acceptance to meet with David, undo the first time I shook hands with the man who would ruin me the moment he said he wanted to be friends, undo everything, and just have a normal life as a nineteen year old going on twenty.

And then there was the whole 'Guardian Angel' garbage. My Mother, although I wasn't, was a very religious person and I remember her telling me stories of Angels when I was younger, and how she knew for a fact I always had one watching over me. She use to say they were beautiful, gentle, peaceful...

Was egotistical, nasty, man-whored steroid injector--roid raging butt hole hidden somewhere in her definition? Because I remember seeing really chunky naked babies with wings the size of butterflies and gentle smiles on their precious little faces, who thrived for happiness and love.

Or was that Cupid?

I just didn't understand any of it. If he was my Guardian Angel, why wasn't he helping me right now? Why wasn't he giving me a hug? Just tell me everything was going to be alright?

Because he's in a relationship with Tiara.

My hands fisted angrily in the blanket draped over me. I was done thinking about David, finally I decided. I mean really, I was watching sad movies, taking medicine for an anxiety filled stomach and head,and wearing my fluffy pajamas for someone as unimportant and inhumane like him?