One shots//English

Me Ves Y Sufres

This imagine is inspired by a song by a British band called Hope of The States. They aren't together anymore but this song always make me so emotive.
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My life is a complete mess. Since childhood, I've always been a bad girl. Well that's what I'm thinking about myself. I'm a poor rich girl born in the wrong family. I don't think I deserve to be here, on this planet called Earth. Nobody seems to care about me so I can do any mistakes and nobody notice.

I've got no good in me for anybody
I've been ruined by the lies I told to everybody
It's so desperately sad that my life has come to this
I hope there's something better than this for me

I was brought in that rich family house when I was 4 years old. My new parents already have a son, Louis. They adopted me cos my biological mother was someone in the family who had drug problems and they decided to take care of me. Louis is my age. He's cute and funny, but sometimes so harrassing. I'm only seeing him as the disturbing brother, the one who just want you to get out of your mind at any time, any places. He tells me everyday that I won't do anything in life. He tells me I got no talent.

I used to think I had something to say
But my dumb ideologies gave me away
I keep my mouth shut, but it's always the same
Over and over and over again

I'm trying to express myself about this situation. It's already been months that he's dragging me deep down into black thoughts. I'm trying to speak with my friends, well I dunno if they are really. No words can get out of my mouth. It's impossible for me to tell others how I feel.
Even when his friends are at home he finds the time to argue with me and let me being the bad one, who is so mean with the others. It was so hard to live with it.

Today I am wrong again, but it's not surprising
Once more heaven has forgotten me so everybody
Clap your hands together for me, as I watch my world collapse
Don't waste your sympathy on me, cause I made it all

This day was like all the others. I've spent it being bullied by the popular girlies, having difficulties to concentrate. As usual I locked myself in the girls bathroom crying my heart out. I got out a few minutes later, my eyes so red from the tears that ran down my cheeks.

My mistakes happen so much it's success
But I'll drag you all down into my sorry mess
I said I was sorry, but it's always the same
Over and over and over again

I bumped into this guy. I remembered him from a party my brother Louis did a couple of weeks ago.

-Anything wrong sweetie? asked me the long curly haired boy.

-no and don't call me sweetie please, I said.

-I'm Harry, and don't cry. You are such a beautiful girl, he told me with a gentle voice.

-It's probably a Louis' trick again, I spatted. I'm pretty sure you are just here to get me in your bed.

-Stop please! I really care about you, he said.

-please leave me alone! I don't need any help I'm okay, I reassured him.

I know Louis just wanted to make me feel bad. He thinks he's funny, but he's just so mean with me, but adorable with all his good old friends. In front of our parents, I'm the demon. That's maybe why he asked his friend Harry to get me in this trap. Harry swears it's not but I doubt it.

I have been doomed from the first time I tried
To find something to save me from all of my lies.

Months later, I was still struggling with my self-esteem. I made a new friend, Jesy. She was cool and helped me to get through all the bullying I was victim. Harry, on his side, tried to approach me but I was still scared of what he can do. He invited me to parties and to the movies. I tried to resist but it was impossible. This guy, these deep luminous green cat's eyes. My feelings were mixed so i gave him a chance.

After a couple of dates, I realised he was a sweet guy, caring about the others, not like my so-called brother. I've opened up my heart to him. He couldn't help getting me my first real loving kiss and we soon became a real couple.

Despite all the negativities, it taught me to get rid of all the mean things of life and that even with some scars left, hope is still there.