Not His Juliet

Chapter 9

I do however convince myself to collect eggs and milk the cows. I mean maybe that's the only milk income for this family and who am I to deny people dairy products? They are a great source of calcium for a well-balanced and healthy diet.

I spot one of the cows who I would guess can produce milk because it has an utter. I don't know how this is supposed to work, like do only the girls make milk or everyone? Only one way to find out. I lead the cow into the barn before ordering it to stay. I quickly grab a low stool from the corner of the barn and sit beside the cow.

I grab a bucket and place it directly under the utter. Okay ready for business. I silently thank the fashion gods above for creating fashionable T-shirts so I don't have to wear a dress or long sleeve while doing this. 

"Okay cow, go." I instruct.

The cow turns at the sound of my voice but does nothing. Stupid cow.

"Okay so maybe cow was a harsh term. What if I just call you Mary-Lou? You should take it as a compliment thou because come on you’re a cow who doesn't respond to 'cow' that pretty much resembles that dumb whore. All you need is to run off with my husband and you guys would be twins." 

Okay its official I've lost it. I'm ranting to a cow. Someone end my misery. 

I continue to keep talking to the Cow newly named 'Mary-Lou' because let's face I have no friends and I've reached rock bottom can't get worse, right?

"So Mary-Lou can you please spray some milk into the bucket and I promise to leave you alone for the rest of the day. Come on, please" I beg to the cow who's looking at me completely dumbfound.

Maybe I should moo at it? Okay I lied, now I've reached rock bottom. I lean my head against the stomach of the cow sighing frustrated with its un-cooperation

"Work with me" I pout to myself.

Suddenly I remember a man milking a cow in an old movie I watch a long time ago. I have to like rub or squeeze or like pull the utter. Okay I can do this. I take a deep yoga breath giving myself a pep talk. 

You can and you will do this White. The world is depending on you to bring them milk. You won't let them down!

Have I mentioned I've recently gone insane? I have? Good, because this is pretty sad. 

I wrap my hand around one of the utter and pull lightly. I wait for a second but nothing happens. Maybe I should pull harder. I wrap my hand around the same utter again and yank down. Mary-Lou shrieks and bucks forwards causing me to fall back off of the chair. She does however manage to finally produce milk, only it doesn't land at all in the bucket opting instead for my damn blouse.

I scream bloody murder totally grossed out. I'm pretty sure that stuff is cleaned before it's even allowed close to humans. I rip my shirt off completely grossed out. I'm so busy freaking out that I don't notice someone has entered the barn most likely at the sound of my scream.

"Angela?" Austin’s voice asks.

I freeze, my back turned to him. I silently curse the heavens for placing me in such a situation. Of course of all moments for Austin to pop in he chooses to make an appearance when I'm standing there in only a red lacy bra, skinny jeans, and heels. Just wonderful, not.

My eyes search frantically trying to locate my shirt while keeping my back towards Austin. When I can't place it I mentally send an angry message to whoever happens to be listening in on my thoughts. Slowly I turn towards Austin, completely embarrassed. Why me!

He locked eyes with me and he looks worried but once he notices what I'm wearing his eyes fall a little taking in the exposed skin. I feel the incredible urge to throw my arms over my body. I don't however because it would only cause to make this more awkward.