Buying Love

Chapter Seventy-Eight

"She won't accept the money, Edward," I said, putting the ornament back onto the tree. I walked to him, slowly. I was in a lot of pain due to the time outside and Edward looked so spooked. "How are you?"

"Numb," he answered, his eyes narrowed and then he sighed. "Sad. Lost. Broken. Relieved. Vindicated."

I reached for his hand and he hesitantly took it from me. We sat down on the couch and there was an obvious gap between us, both physically and emotionally. I took the blanket, covering both of our legs. Edward gave me a timid smile, but it didn't reach his empty eyes. "Let's start with numb," I said.

"So many emotions. I don't know how to react to them," he said. "Not feeling anything seemed like a logical choice."

"Sad, because of Jared?" I pressed. Edward didn't respond out loud. He did nod and gripped his hands into tight fists, clenching them around the blanket. "It's okay to be sad, Edward. You lost someone close to you."

"Now that I was free, I wanted to build more a friendship with Jared," Edward whispered, his brows furrowed and his body rigid. "I needed to have him in my life. He saw what I went through and he still cared. You know? I feel lost because he would always give me advice or be a supportive sounding board when I struggled. He didn't know much, mainly stuff about my mom, but he was there for me in a tiny way. Carlisle, in his own way, has filled those shoes but Jared was there first."

"And why do you feel broken?" I asked, moving closer and taking one of his hands into mine. He kept his hand in a fist, but eventually weaved his fingers into mine.

"Because all of that nightmare was my life and those jurors know about it. I'm happy that they believe that she's a monster and went to send her to trial, but that will mean more people will know about my shame," he muttered. "I don't want people to know. I never wanted you to know." His eyes fluttered shut and tears began streaming down his cheeks. "It's bad enough that I lived it, but for anyone besides me to know about it. I'm sick about that."

"You're not the only one who was a victim in this, Edward. Jasper, Elianna, all of you were victims," I whispered, moving closer and wiping the tears from his cheeks. "Your mother was a victim. All of you lost your ability to say no and that's wrong. Esme needs to pay for that."

He turned to me, opening his eyes and they were so haunted, that the green appeared gray. "I just don't know if I have the strength to keep doing this. One step forward – Esme's indictment – and two steps back with Jared's death and my reaction to his death."

"We don't have to worry about Esme's indictment or her trial until after the holidays," I said, brushing his damp hair off his forehead. "And your reaction to Jared's death is normal, baby. You lost someone you loved. It's okay to grieve. I want you to. Don't hold back, cry, scream, rage ... do what you need to feel better. I'm here for you."

He closed his eyes, pressing his cheek to my hand. Slowly, he enfolded me into his arms and held me so close to his body as he cried, his entire frame shaking with his emotions. We eventually fell onto the couch and were in a tangle of limbs, drifting to sleep; the emotions of the day finally catching up with us.

When I woke up, I startled to see both Carlisle and Rose sitting across from Edward and me. He was holding onto me so tightly that I was almost numb from the power behind his embrace. It took a few wiggles to get out from his grasp and I got up. It was clumsy and uneven, but I got up, covering Edward with the blanket. "What is it?" I asked, whispering to them as we walked to my office. "Is it something about Jared? Was it Esme?"

"No! He truly died of natural causes. The car accident he had bruised his heart and it just gave out," Carlisle said. "He was only sixty-five. Too young to die."

"So, she inadvertently caused his death. Can she be charged for vehicular manslaughter?" I sneered. "What else?"

"There's no clear link to Jared's car crash and Esme's involvement. So, that would be no on the vehicular manslaughter," Carlisle said.

"Though, Emmett did find information about Jared's family and the cops checked out his home, finding a revised will on his desk," Rose said, handing me a large envelope, addressed to Edward. "

"He knew he was going to die," I whispered, turning the envelope over in my hands.

"It appeared so," Carlisle murmured.

"Did you read the information?" I asked.

"No. Emmett did when they found the envelope, but I haven't. You should give it to Edward. He'll want to have it," Carlisle said, getting up and kissing my head. "Love you, Little One."

"Love you, too, Carlisle," I whispered. "Thank you for the information and for being here, for both of us."

"We're family," Carlisle smirked.

He offered a hand to Rose, who followed him out of the office. They were quiet when they left and I just stared at the envelope. I couldn't open it since it belonged to Edward, but I was so curious as to what was inside. Getting up, I padded to the living room where Edward was still asleep, snoring quietly. I sat down by his feet and rubbed his leg. He shifted, moaning quietly. I smiled as he sleepily opened his eyes. The sadness still remained, but he appeared more rested. "Hey, baby," I whispered. "Sorry to wake you."

"It's okay," he said, sitting up and yawning. "I'm kind of hungry and I've got a killer headache."

"I'll order something from the room service, but first I want to tell you about Jared," I whispered.

He blinked and his brow furrowed. "Was it Esme?"

"No. Jared did die of natural causes, Edward," I said. "His death was a massive heart attack, but that was brought on by injuries from a car accident. The steering column of the car nearly shattered his sternum, which bruised his heart. I'm sorry."

"What caused the car accident?" Edward asked, his voice dropping into a low growl. "If it was foul play, I have no doubt that Esme was involved, the sadistic, evil bitch." He looked at the envelope in my hands. "What's that?"

"It's from Jared, Edward," I said. "I don't know what's inside, but it was in his house. Emmett and the cops at the house found it in his office." I handed him the envelope. He took it tentatively, holding it like it was something very precious. "I'll let you read that. I'll order us some food."

"No, please. Stay," he pleaded, taking my hand. I snuggled next to him as he tore open the envelope. He pulled out a packet of information, with a hand-written letter on top. Edward flipped through the papers and his eyes widened. "Holy shit!"

"What?" I asked.

"Jared ... he left me ..." he breathed, his green eyes reading the legal document in front of him. "If I'm understanding this, he left me everything."

A/N: I'm still sad about Jared. Truly, I am, but he gave Edward a tremendous gift. You'll find out exactly what that gift is in the next chapter when we hear from Edward. We'll also have some Edward/Carlisle time and some time with Elizabeth. I think that Edward needs a father right now and that's Carlisle.

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