Never Knowing Why

Chapter 4

I know two updates back to back? Well I just have been dying to bring more of this story to life. Not as long as I would like it but I have homework and dance class. Comment Vote Fan

 By some miracle I managed to fall asleep again and thankfully the nightmare didn’t come back. I tried my best to be my usual cheerful self, but I should have known that my friends would see right through it.

“Nicole we know that something’s wrong. What’s going on?” Ashley asked me.

The table we were at grew silent and I felt all of their eyes on me.

I dropped my gaze to the ground and when I looked up to meet their eyes I said “I don’t know, but when I figure it out you will be the first to know. Can you please trust me on that?”

All 4 of them did the impossible 4 way glance at each other and nodded. I let out a deep relieved sigh that I didn’t know that I was holding in.

 The rest of the day was normal and flew by fast. I went into my room then climbed on my bed to do my homework. The locket and diary were sitting on my nightstand right next to me where I had left them the night before. I couldn’t concentrate with them sitting so close to me. Finally I grabbed them and put them in the drawer.

 I climbed back onto my bed and grabbed the binder I was using as a writing desk. I let out a deep aggravated breath and told myself ‘Ok Nicole focus. You need to focus.’

With the intent on focusing I attacked my geometry homework again.  A half hour later I was done and moving on to my other homework. An hour later I was completely done with all of my homework.

                For the last hour and a half the need to focus on the diary and locket had been agonizing. I got the locket and the diary from the drawer and set them on the bed. I climbed back on and stared at them lying side by side for a few minutes. After gathering my courage I decided to read another diary entry because I figured that it was best to take things slow and start easy.

6 July 1912

                I had the awful nightmare again about what happened last year. I figure that it is normal to experience these types of dreams after what happened. But every night I am back on that ship…

I gasped and reread the sentence over and over trying to comprehend what I was reading. So she had been having nightmares as well and what had happened the year before? I started to read from where I left off.

                … on that ship and it feels so lifelike as if I am reliving it again. I wake up in a cold sweat and I cry all over again. It is so awful what happened to the other people on that ship that didn’t make it. I am just grateful that my family survived the tragedy. The only good part of the dreams is seeing him again even if it is just a dream. I miss him so much that it hurts to where it feels like my heart is breaking. When I let myself remember the four days were the best of my life. If I only knew where he was….

                When I read this I knew that this “Will” had survived as well from whatever tragedy she was talking about.

                … was then I could finally say good bye. It is almost time for the household to wake up so I will leave off here.

                                                                                                Nicole Summers

 I sat back and digested what I had just read. If I could only figure out what tragedy she was talking about then it would be easier to know what I was looking for. I knew what tragedy it was and it was right there in my mind. But every time I tried to think of its name I couldn’t think of it.

I was exhausted so I decided that I would think of it in the morning. I got my favorite pj bottoms on that where ice blue with cute polar bears on them and an navy blue Aeropastale night shirt that had a big star on it. I climbed in under the covers and turned out my lamp. I snuggled in and closed my eyes with a content sigh. After a few minutes I sat up and in the dark whispered the name I had forgotten.

“Titanic”