Life Is A Game Everyone Plays (Sequel to Magcon Sleepover)

He's had what?! Since When?!

Last time in Magcon Sleepover

" It's M-Matthew." He spit out. Yep, there it is my heart dropping to my feet. I pulled away from the hug.

" Matthew? Wh-what about h-him? " I asked. My heart was beating faster than before.

" He... "

" He was so depressed where he couldnt do anything. He wouldnt leave the house. The only time he did was when we would have to go to magcon or have a meeting or go get food. But he wouldnt really smile like usual. Then one day at Magcon he just went off." Cameron said calmly.

" Wh-What do you mean he just... went off?" I asked.

" Since he was 14 he was diagnosed with this, uh... syndrome... its called tourette's syndrome. It's a neurological disorder characterized by involuntary tics and vocalizations and often the compulsive utterance of obscenities. It happens here and there. He can but cant control it. We've tried to help by getting him help. Its been working but the progress has been really slow" He told me. I pushed loose  strands of my hair from over my face and sighed. 

" Hayles.... this morning he tried to end it." there it goes. my last heart beat. knowing my twin brother... almost killed himself... because of me. I breathed in my last bit of air then everything went black.

@2 hours later

My eyes slowly started to open.

@2 hours later

My eyes slowly started to open.

" Guys shes waking up." I heard a male voice say. My blurry vision started to clear up and i could see clearly..

At the Magcon House 

I walked in shyly. For why? Idk. 

" Guys!" Cameron yelled. 

" In here." I heard Shawns voice. I really missed him. I've missed all of them.

Me and Cam walked into the kitchen. Once all the guys saw me, I then knew i messed up. Kidding im kidding.

" Hayley!!" They all yelled. 

" Wait, wait... one at a time." I said softly. They all nodded and lined up. But it didnt seem like all of them. I shrugged it off and decided to wait. Nash was the first to hug me. His eyes were the lightest of blue's. I smiled as he hugged me. Its been 2 months with no communication, no seeing each other or even contact of any source. 

After I hugged everyone, well almost everyone. I seen Hayes leaning against the island table. He was looking at his feet. Does he not wanna see me? Is he not happy to see me.

" Hayes." I said a little above a whisper. He slowly lifted up his head meeting me eye to eye. His were grey and im sure mine were grey too. 

I didnt know what to do or say. Should i hug him? Should I say hi? or should I just,  do what im doing now... nothing.

" Hayley." Hayes said then walked up to me embracing me into the warmest hug. I hugged back wrapping my arms around him. " I'm so sorry Hayley. Ive missed you so so much." He said while hugging me. I wanted to cry so much. I dont know what to do. He hurt me... But I hurt him. This, ugh. 

" I've missed you too." I smiled softly still hugging him. 

" Please for give m-" He was cut off by someone yelling random things.

" What the Heck! Ugly azz! Fag! Rat! Eww! ScrewFace! Stupid! Retard! Your dramatic! Buttface! crackhead! Fat!" We all heard from upstairs. The guys sighed starting to go upstairs. 

" Whats going on?"  I asked. 

" It's Matth-" Carter was stopped by Cameron hitting the back of his head. " Ow." he said. I was about to walk upstairs but someone grabbed my arm. I turned and saw it was Hayes.

" let me see, my brother." I said sternly. He sighed and let me go. I then went upstairs and followed the yelling to my roo- i mean my old room. I opened the door and saw Shawn, Nash, Aaron, Taylor and the Jacks around the room spread out watching Matthew's scene. 

" Dumb! Piece of crap! Fat head!" Matthew yelled. He was staring at the tv then he would glance at one of the guys for a bit. He was blinking over and over again. Not like regular blinking, like twitching and blinking fast. The scene was kinda scary tbh. I was about to walk towards him but Aaron grabbed a hold of my wrist softly. I gave him a look that read 'it's ok'. I mean its not like he's gonna hurt me. 

Aaron let go and I walked up to Matthew as he is still rambling things like 'Ugly', 'Stupid', 'Dumb' and more. When I got to where I was in front of him, he stopped. I weakly smiled. This is scary. Me seeing my brother like this.

What caught me by surprise was when his hand jerked towards me. I flinched back almost falling. But someone caught me.

" It's ok. He wont hurt you its an effect of the physical tic." Taylor said. Then i noticed hes the one that caught me. I stood up. Matt was playing with his hand. They were shaking a bit. I sat next to him. His hand jerked forward but towards me a bit.. but I didn't flinch or move. 

" Hey big brother." I said. He smiled a bit and looked at me.

" Hey sis... I've missed you." He said with his eyes watering. Mine did too. He wrapped his arms around me and I did the same. 

Soon you could hear him silently crying. I squeezed my eyes shut trying not to sob. I heard shuffling, so I opened my eyes and saw the guys leaving. I closed them again when tears started to fall. He pulled away from the hug. I covered my face trying to hold back from crying hard. A lump was in my throat and it hurt. This is my fault. Matt became depressed and hurt because of me. I left him feeling hurt and guilty because of me. His syndrome was cleared and basically gone till I had to do what I did. 

The lump left my throat and I was done. I busted into tears sobbing my eyes out. He pulled me onto his lap cradling me.  I cried till I couldn't cry anymore. The feeling of thinking and knowing that this situation is my fault hurts... a lot.