How To Be The Best Psycho Fan Girl The World Has Ever Seen

The Day of the Widow.

Now, you may have gone through this personally, or you've watched a friend. Either way, no matter how deep your love is for you poster board baby, when he gets a girlfriend, you put on a black veil and mourn. For weeks.

Now, I've been through this a couple times. My Harry has had a list of... "friends" who I never approved of. Did that stop me from following him? For a little while, yes. In fact, I actually thought about become a Liam girl just to spite his cheating butt.

But ultimately, you know it's got a 99.8% chance that it isn't going to last very long.

In the meantime, you've got three options. One, you can join the hate squad of whoever they're dating. You track her down and throw shade on everything she touches.

She sings for a charity? Comment how ugly her wardrobe is. She adopts a puppy? Encourage the dog to eat her. She goes on vacation with him... alone... on his yacht? Swim out to the ocean and sink that sucker. (Don't really do that...)

Or, you can join the second squad, which is "Love all, hate none."

Now this group really burns my biscuits. These are the girls who can stay lovingly faithful, and legitimately happy when they see their boy in the gossip columns with his new gf.

They make me sick.

But honestly, I admire them to the moon and back. They'll be great wives one day. Unlike the first group.

But the third group is the one I lean towards. We are the denyers.
I don't care of he said he's dating, I don't care of his mother said he's dating, I don't care of Ellen said he's dating. If he's my guy, HE AIN'T FOR SALE.

I will deny every shred of truth and fact that are shot my way. That's right.

It's all a publicity stunt. His managers forced him into it. Alan Carr lied. I'll use any excuse to steer clear of the truth.

And I'll probably become a little more dieheart because of it too. Which brings me to the next chapter...