Punks Don't Like Nerds

oh dean

AN

Omg so many warnings in this chapter. Im just sorry.

Castiel's POV

At 1:37am they found him in his apartment while Sam was out. His neighbor reported a gunshot. They say they thought someone had broken in but I knew better.

When they called me with the news I didn't cry, I screamed. Tears would not come and I screamed. I screamed until my lungs shirt and my throat was raw. I screamed for dean. I screamed for sam. I screamed for us. I screamed for love. I screamed until nothing more would come and I sat and stared blankly at the wall.

It seemed like the whole world was screaming.

Dean Winchester is dead.

~Two weeks later~

I need him, I ache for him. I haven't eaten for days. My hair is a mess. I need to change out of my pajamas some time. But not yet. I think his funeral was the worst part all of the people speaking of the love for dean. But where were they when he needed it?

~Flashback to deans funeral~

It was my turn to speak. Please keep it together.

I approached the podeam and spoke to all the unfamiliar people in the stands.

"Dean" I clear my throat " you're gone" somebody coughs. "And I knew you never wanted to see me cry but goddammit dean I had plans. I was gonna be a rock star, travel the world, and see everything." a tear slips from my eye and stings my flushed cheeks finally dropping to my tie.

"But then you came along and ruined everything in the best possible way. Dean I fell in love with you and you left. Dont dean . . . . dont you dare leave me. I need you. I need your five alarm green eyes like I need oxygen. You can't be dead because it would kill me dean. I made plans to spend the rest of My life with you. Now what do I do? How do I move on from you dean?"

~Present time~

I wish they had known me better then because I am no longer myself. People say he was the one to perish but I also died that day. A bullet now pierces my skull full of his empty promises and once meaningful words. My life shattered like stricken glass that day. My flame of hope has smoldered into a distant smoke fooling my mind with the sweet sent of him.

Dean.

Dean Winchester was the love of my life. I never want to forget.