Monster ⇎ Jim Kirk [On Hold]

3

Just one more time before I go
I'll let you know
That all this time I've been afraid
Wouldn't let it show
Nobody can save me now

Battle Cry; Imagine Dragons

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--Two Weeks have Passed--

Jim strode onto the bridge, suppressing the pain he was feeling. It was now routine to him, putting on a fake convincing smile and going on business as usual. No one except Doctor McCoy and a few nurses knew what Jim struggled with. Spock was having his suspicions, but no one was able to confirm them.

"Captain, we have a conference call with Starfleet command in 4 minutes and 39 seconds. 38 seconds. 37 seconds. 36 seconds. 35 seconds." Spock repeated before the whole bridge glared at him. He got the hint eventually and quit repeating the seconds over and over again.

"Thank you Spock." Jim acknowledged, sighing as he looked at the screen. Today he had not felt his best, he felt as though he was being pulled down by a weight and was now suffocating, drowning.

Taking a deep breath, Jim closed his eyes. His blood pounded in his ears, his heart beat slow and steady. Standing up, he kept his eyes closed tight as the blood rushed to his head again. Opening his eyes, spots danced in his vision. It took some quick blinking to rid the annoying spots.

"Ready, captain?" Uhura asked, swiveling in her chair to face Jim. He glanced around, a smile plastered on his face.

"Ready Lieutenant, thank you." Jim answered, facing the screen once again. Starfleet officials appeared on the screen, Admiral Pike among them. It was nice to have a familiar face in such an intimidating situation.

"Status report Captain Kirk." The head of departments commanded, her voice steady and not wavering at all. Kirk gave a quick smile, looking down at a PADD Chekov just handed to him.

"All systems functioning. We have a little break in the warp core, but it is being repaired as we speak. The health of the crew had been mostly well, no outbreaks of any virus' or diseases. Few deaths, only a few tragedies on away missions." Jim reported, watching as the room shifted in and out of focus. He must've been pretty convincing that he wasn't dizzy; no one looked twice at him.

"Thank you. How is the well being of your main crew members, none of them are out?" She asked Jim, surprising him. Jim took a deep breath, glancing around at the bridge crew.

"Everyone is quite, uh, well." Jim stumbled, wincing at his own mistake. Pike took a breath in worry, really noticing how the young captain looked. He looked thin, weak, pained.

"Kirk, is your well being alright? You seem swayed and dizzy." Pike pointed out, the others officers nodding in agreement. Spock looked at Jim, raising an eyebrow. Jim closed his eyes, leaning against the captain's chair for support. His whole body swayed, his breath getting shallow.

He couldn't show weakness yet at the same time his lip quivered, tears threatening to fall. Dizziness swayed over him and next thing Jim knew, he was on the floor. Yelling swirled in his ears, the blurry image of Chekov and Spock over him. Unconsciousness threatened to take over, to pull him down into it's deep grasp.

Doctor McCoy ran onto the bridge, med kit in hand. "Jim, you're gonna hate me for asking this in front of the crew, but did you cut yourself while in sickbay? Jim? Did you cut yourself?"

Jim nodded, rolling his head on the cold hard floor. He weakly pointed at his left wrist, a red bandage poking out just barely from the sleeve. Nyota cried at her station, surprised that her friend would do this. Sulu looked at his feet, unable to find the right way to react. Chekov cried silently, tucking his knees up to his face.

McCoy and Spock helped him to his feet, basically dragging him down to sickbay. Jim would never forgive himself for being so weak, especially in front of Starfleet officials. Now everyone knew and life would never be the same again.

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I just wanna let everyone know that Jim will have a love interest soon. An OC, so not a slash with preexisting character. This fanfic is gonna be 20 chapters, I've already planned it out. Lot's of time skips. Just kind of my writing style. Hope everyone understands. Hope you enjoyed this chapter! Feel free to vote and comment, I love hearing from you!