Dugout Girl

Chapter Twelve

"My doctor told me that I can never play baseball again," I said leaning my head on his shoulder.

"What! No way. They can't tell you that," he said shocked.

"Well they can and they did," I told him feeling my eyes water up again.

"Oh my god. I'm so sorry Luce," he said pulling me into a hug.

"I don't know what I'm going to do," I wailed.

"Shh, it's okay Luce. I'm here for you. We're going to find a doctor who will help you. I will move heaven and hell to get your shoulder healthy again. I promise," he told me wiping the tears from my eyes.

"Thank you Ryan," I said hugging him again. "I'm glad that's just your practice jersey," I told him pointing out my tear stains on his chest.

"They'll dry don't worry about it, go get changed before you're late to the dugout," he said noting that everyone was starting to leave for BP.

"Yeah I'll get changed, you go ahead before you're late too," I said getting up.

"Alright, I love you Luce," he said kissing the top of my head.

"And I love you," I said back.

I quickly got changed but before I did, I stood in front of the mirror looking at my shoulder.

Yeah it looked kind of fucked up, but the doctor was supposed to fix it for me. And he didn't. He made my shoulder look fucked. It didn't even really look like a normal shoulder.

There was the scar, but that didn't bother me. It was the bumps and ripples where my muscles were supposedly fused back together that bothered me.

What did they do to my shoulder? I put my shirt on then my jersey and ball cap then ties my cleats then made my way out to the dugout.

I stepped into the dugout and took a deep breath. I loved this place.

JD came up beside me.

"How you doin?" He asked.

"I'm okay," I told him.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah," I said staring off at the field.

"Whatever's bugging you, don't let it get to you too much. Keep your chin up, it gets better I promise," he said giving me a side hug.

"The doctor told me that I can never play baseball ever again. And I think he fucked up my shoulder. I'm going to see every doctor that I can to see if it can be fixed. But I don't know. I'm completely crushed Josh. I don't know what to do, what to think. It's really overwhelming," I told him not crying this time.

"Oh my god. Lucy. I don't know what to say because I don't know how it feels. To be told you can never swing a bat again ever? I'd probably die," he said bringing me into another hug.

"I know I feel like dieing. But you should see my shoulder. It doesn't look right. I think they fucked it for real," I told him taking my jersey off.

You could see the bumps through my shirt. He pulled my shirt off of my shoulder and winced.

"I know eh? She looks pretty bad."

"Uhm yeah, if I was you I'd get one of our team doctors to look at that. That definitely doesn't look right," he said studying my shoulder.

"I will after the game don't you worry," I told him slipping my jersey back on. "Go do BP or I'm benching you," I threatened.

He ran out of the dugout and over to the cages and then Ryan came in.