try and catch me now - 0.3

Chapter 2: Blinded

(WARNING: YOU MIGHT CRY FOR THE NEXT COUPLE OF CHAPTERS IF YOUR ATTACHED TO THESE BOOKS AND THE CHARACTERS..)

•Chapter 2: Blinded•

*They say that if you love something set it free, if it comes back to you it's yours to keep, if it doesn't it was never meant to be*

I ran out of the church and up to the roof. I sat there for hours watching the cars drive past and the kids walk past laughing and joking with their friends. I wish that was me. A kid that didn't have to worry about anything, a kid that wasn't adopted and didn't have a horrible past. I always ask the Lord that, he never seems to respond though.

I hear the door open behind me. I ignore it admiring the beautiful sunset. The person sits next to me.
"I thought I would find you up here."
I look over to be met with those blue eyes.

Niall.

"Yeah." I whisper.
"Lena?" He asks.
"Yes." I respond.
"Can't you just get over the fact that I'm getting married. You know that we were never a thing." He fires at me.
I look him straight in the eyes.
"YOU KNOW WHAT NIALL! I DON'T LOVE YOU OR LIKE YOU! I'm trying to help you! You don't understand what she does to us. You think she's some amazing girl that is kind, sweet, and caring. She's not! Get your head out of your Irish ass and look around! She's a devil! She treats us like crap! If you can't see that your blind!" I yell.
"I love her Lena! She is the best person you could ever know! Stop tearing her apart! We were and never will be a thing!" He screams.
"I DON'T WANT US TO BE A THING! YOU NEVER KNOW ANYTHING NIALL! I GET TREATED LIKE CRAP AND NO ONE CARES! IM JUST TRYING TO HELP YOU!" I scream back.
He gets up and opens the door.
"Are you helping me or yourself?" He asks.
"I'm trying to help everyone." I whisper as he shuts the door.
I look back at the horizon. Sunsets have always been my favorite. Mums too. 'You don't have a mum Lena. Your stupid and ugly! Can't you see why no one wanted to adopt you all those years!' My mind yells things at me I don't want to hear.
'I know' I tell myself. I know I'm all those things. I deserve to be dead. I should have died that night in the lake. Niall shouldn't have saved me. I'm worthless, I want to run but I can't. There's no where to go, Nan is dead now, everyone is. It's my fault too.
'There is one place to go' My mind yells.
"Where?" I ask it aloud.

"Heaven." I whisper aloud.

I didn't say that though. It's like an angel or devil lives in me, always taking over my body. No one will care if I'm gone, they won't even notice. No one loves me anyway. I though I was done hurting myself, but I'm not. If you want to know ask the Irish one. I stand up looking at the cold dark sidewalk. 3 stories down. I stand on the ledge ready to die. The door behind me opens.
"LENA NO!" My dad yells.

I jump.

My body makes contact with the pavement.

Darkness takes over.