OLD VERSION! DONT READ!

/Chapter Thirteen/ Mother/

“I’ve been…a bit rude to you in the past and I don’t think I could stay here and interrupt anything.”

“But its fine, seriously you need somewhere to stay and live till you can get back from this tragedy.” Tragedy? More like tragedies. So many events have gone wrong so far in my life all at once – being disowned then having my fiancée killed. I can’t dump myself on someone else. “Look, just stay for….a week and then go. I don’t know where to but at least It’ll give you time to come to terms with things.”

I agreed with him. Maybe a little thinking time would help me.

Nathaniel brought me a large basin of warm water and a fresh dress from his mother’s wardrobe. I bathed alone in the room and got into the clean though dull white gown. When I was descent he came back in with some food but I did not want to eat anything. I sat with Nathaniel for a little while, just listening to our slow breathing and decided I had no desire to do anything else with this day so I curled up into a ball and half buried myself in the hay.

“I…I have to go and feed my horses, I won’t be more than an hour…unless you want to come?” he asked me.

“I don’t want to be alone.”

He gave me an encouraging grin and helped me up out of the hay. Nathaniel must have taken me across the village and to the countryside because within five minutes of walking, we arrived at the stables.

Nathaniel unlocked the stables and set to work feeding the horses.

I couldn’t help but wonder off and find the horse Bella. “Hey girl,” I greeted her and began to stroke long nose. Her coat felt like velvet under my skin and I enjoyed stroking her. It felt soothing – when I brushed her coat it was like all the feelings I had melted away for a little while.

“Whenever you want to ride her you can,” Nathaniel said, startling me a bit. “She really does like you.”

I nodded and gave the graceful creature a scratch behind the ear, causing it to neigh contently. “May I feed her?” I asked Nathaniel.

He nodded and handed me a small sack of oats. And I held it as Bella dipped her muzzle into the sack and ate. I couldn’t help but smile at the rate she was eating – did Nathaniel starve her all day?

I brought her muzzle to my lips and gave the creature a kiss. She neighed happily; she liked me.

Nathaniel sighed behind me and I immediately moved a few steps away from the horse. “Sorry.”

“No, no its alright. I should get used to it,” he gave me a shy smile.

I liked Bella, she felt so…different to me. When I stroked her I felt like I had no problems or care in the world. Almost like I was free of everything for the while and that made me feel good.

Now my hands were off the horse, I felt the feelings of despair rush back to me as if they never left.

“You can ride her sometime, maybe not today but anytime really.” I didn’t answer. As much as I liked Bella I did not feel I deserved to go horse riding. How could I have fun at a time like this? Nathaniel must have seen me go to the brink of tears and quickly blink them away so said, “I promise I will not get jealous and slap Bella again.” I chuckled once for his sake and Bella grunted and pushed him backwards a little with her nose.

“I’d love to.” Wrapping my arms around Bella once again, I felt the misery being pulled out of me once again and I was lost in a place where nothing bad happened in my life. Where no one had gone insane, no one innocent persn’s life was taken away from me and I didn’t have my love killed. It felt okay to think about Alexander – I thought of the good times without getting upset; like when he first kissed m and when he first held me in his arms and how I felt when he told me he loved me. Why was this life so cruel to the people around me? Even though I felt no sadness with my arms around Bella but I still had the little voice in the back of my mind telling me as soon as I let go, the pain will come back. No matter how long I clung to the horse, it would not erase the past and the fact that bad things had happened. There was no use trying to hide the fact behind my tears and empty promises. There is no spell to bring a person back to life, my father had searched for one many years after mother died but he could not find one. I wanted to bring Alexander and my mother back, but it would be impossible.

“Nothing is impossible Mercy darling, hope is the key,” My heart began to beat furiously against my chest and I released the horse and stumbled back onto the hay covered floors of the stable. It couldn’t be, it can’t be!

Nathaniel must have heard the voice as well because he called out, “Who said that? Who goes there?”

“There was no answer.

“Mercy let me help you up,” Nathaniel offered trying to pick me up off of the ground but I told him to stop. I listened intensely to the sounds around me. The birds chirping, the other horses breathing contently and the gentle breeze was all I could hear – nothing else.

“It was probably my imagination,” I told myself.

“It couldn’t be, I heard that voice as well,” Nathaniel commented.

“Oh Mercy, stand up won’t you please? God knows what's crawling about in that hay,”

The voice came from Bella. I looked at Nathaniel, “Bella talks?!”

He looked just as confused as I did, “yes but never in that voice, her tone is a lot rougher usually,” he told me. “It’s like she’s softer with you…like she knows you.”

When Bella spoke I felt a cold chill down my spine. This could not be! It was impossible!

The impostor’s voice was exactly the as Bella’s but…different. It had that hint of pure kindness that racked thousands of memories in my head. The image of me when I was five flashed by in my head quickly. It was me running through a field of crops, being chased by a person with that same voice telling me it was lunch time. I saw another image of me, a little older and with longer hair at the age of six sitting on a woman’s lap whilst she brushed my hair. Then, I saw another image of woman whispering ‘I love you’ as she kissed a seven year old Mercy goodnight. So many things are real and are possible in this world but I never thought this could happen. It was my mother – my mother was in Bella the horse. It was her, I knew it was really her.

“Mother.” I said in awe.

“Hello my angel.”

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I'mma leave yall with your questions and that, lets just say that there's going to be a lot of....events in these final chapters ;))

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Monique <33