Not What I Had in Mind (Chat Noir x reader)

Eat the Spaghetti to forgetti since you're upsetti

     frick the title name was too long so i had to shorten it. it's actually Eat the spaghetti to forgetti the fact that you showed someone you were sad since you're upsetti (by Panic!At the Disco)

I slammed the fridge's door open. I grabbed the Tupperware filled with spaghetti and shoved it into the open microwave. I put the time for a minute and tapped my foot impatiently against the tile floor.

I can't believe I was akumatized. Me of all people. I don't like pointing things out when I'm upset most of the time so getting akumatized is getting the problem pointed out a little too late. I showed her that she got under my skin. I never got akumatized when Noir admitted he liked Ladybug. Obviously I wasn't showing my emotions out in public as much. Always brushing off things and calling it tiredness.
The microwave beeped so I took out the spaghetti and grabbed a plastic fork from the utensil drawer and made my way back to my room. The journey up the stairs was tough since I ran all the way home. Curse these legs.
I got to my room and plopped down onto my bed. The locket bounced up as I did and hit my chin.
"Fucking dicks." I grumbled. I flipped open the locket using one hand; note to self, never do that while holding a thing of spaghetti. Some spaghetti landed on my p.js. Frickle frackle. There was the picture of Hannah, Riley, Grayson, Fern, and I. It was a photo from a few years ago. Riley was wearing her shirt that read "Tol & U Smol" and everyone had smug grins on their faces. I wanted to punch them in their guts.
I was being used as an armrest. Now, looking back on it, it's actually a fond memory. I miss them. I wonder how different things would have been if I stayed in California. I've went down a rabbit hole and ended up 10 miles past Wonderland.
Hannah had an afro going on back then and Grayson was still pretty short. Fern was wearing a shirt with sleeves that ended at her forearms. Very scandalous. And Riley... Riley was still pretty gay but with shorter hair.
I smiled at the picture, the tears began to well up. I heard a knock at my balcony door. That could only be one person. I stood up hesitantly, letting the dropped spaghetti fall onto my floor. Damnit. I walked over the clothes on the ground and to the door.
I opened it and saw Noir with a bouquet of roses? Okay? I stepped aside for him to enter and as he stepped in he gave the flowers to me with a sympathetic smile. I blinked in confusion. Why was he giving these to me?
He lead me over to my bed and sat down. Just barely missing my spaghetti. Thank god because there was no way I would eat booty spaghetti. He patted the side next to him so I sat down.
"(Y/n)," he started, "I.... I am so sorry that I did this to you."
I was taken aback, "Er, what? You didn't do anything to me."
"I'm the reason you were akumatized..."
Well he didn't akumatize me months ago and I'm over that. The only people I was upset with at the time was Marinette and... and Adrien.
I put my hand against his cheek and made him look at me. He did always looked like him. His personality was always that same as Adrien's. So I was right. He is Adrien.
​​​​​​ "You motherfucker."
He was taken aback by this. This isn't heartfelt at all no fuck this. I'm pissed.
"This is what you've been hiding. It's been months, it's 2016 now! You told me that you would tell me about this later in November! Yet here we are in April with me just finding out! Adrien, do you.. do you not trust me?" This is what it all comes down to - trust.
He grabbed my hands, his alter ego went away to reveal his true self. The guilt was visible in his eyes, "I'm sorry. I don't have an excuse. I know you're angry with me and that I should have told you sooner. I trust you."
"Then why didn't you tell me!? I could have helped you more if I knew! I'm left in the dark, even my friends from California hardly told me anything. I love them all the same but I want to help people and not be left in the dark."
"(Y/n), I would have to worry about you trying to help whenever an akuma attacked. You could get hurt, or worse, killed. I couldn't live with myself knowing you would get harmed trying to help me. But now, you've been akumatized and it's all my fault. I hurt you without meaning to. I was trying to keep you safe. But since I told you months that I would explain things later I thought you'd forget about it because I wasn't thinking then. I was just worried that you'd get hurt and now you're eating your feelings away with spaghetti!"
I squinted at him, "Fuck you, I love spaghetti. And I.. I'm not eating my feelings... I just haven't eaten breakfast yet."
He gave me a "tell the truth" look. I sighed. I don't remember opening up to somebody in a while. Break down the walls.
"Okay, yes, I'm eating my feelings. Knowing me, I would come to school tomorrow depressed as hell and blame it on being tired. Also, i thought you were starting to get annoyed with me. Whenever I tried to talk to you about it, you would just brush it off and walk away. I feel alone and unwanted. Like I'm a bug, not even a butterfly or ladybug..." Ladybug. Great, now I'm crying. "I want to feel wanted. I don't want to be thrown away. I'm not a piece of trash goddamnit. I call myself trash as a joke, it's not what I should be to other people. That's what i felt like. I don't even acknowledge my own feelings sometimes. I always put on a happy demeanor and pretend I'm happy. It fools me, it fools everyone else. Though I had a pretty shitty day yesterday so out the window when the mask. It wasn't just you, it was because one of my friends who likes you. I... she's not my friend... is she?"
I pulled my hands away from him and pulled my knees up to my chest. She's not my friend anymore is she? Marinette hates me. All because I couldn't help but like Adrien. Then again, she just accused me of flirting with him when I wasn't. I was annoying her. I became a piece of trash. I just wanted to be let into the light and be able to understand my friend better. Understand why she was the miraculous Ladybug. I let it get to me. I need to stop suppressing feelings. That is why I became akumatized, isn't it?
I sniffled as he patted my back, "She's... she's that girl you mentioned when Nathanael got akumatized." I nodded. "Who is she?"
"I- I'm not sure if I should tell you." Even if she hates me now, I should respect her privacy.
"Are you sure?"
"I can deal with it myself."
He gave me a hug, "Alright, and remember, I'll be more honest and I won't run off when I should tell you something."
Turning my head to face him, I gave a small smile, "Thank you.."
He smiled back, "Is this a bad time to say that I love you?" he turned red.
I shook my head, "I love you too... asshole."
He gave me a kiss on the forehead and got off my bed. The sudden shift in weight toppled my spaghetti over. It was on my sheets. This. Is. The. Worst. Day. Ever.
"Well that's gonna suck to clean up." said a flOATING CAT WHAT THE FUCK.
I screamed and fell off my bed.

I sat there under a tree after school. I've actively been avoiding Marinette all day long. I don't know if she even likes me anymore. She knows that it got to me though when I got akumatized. If she doesn't want to be my friend anymore then that's okay. People stop being friends all the time. It'll be the same as that. Sure, I'll be sad for a little while but I'll be fine.
'I stole Alice's girlfriend aaaayyyy" texted Riley.
+AliceZ+ has been added to the group chat by +SmolTortilla+
+AliceZ+ sent a photo
Alice sent a picture of her holding a baseball bat with nails driven into them with Grayson pounding his fist into his palm in the background.
'Bout to get our girls back <3' texted Alice.
'Grayson if u love me you'll knock out my big sis'
'Riley plz she could kill me and i'm trying to love you damnit'
'when did u assholes start going out tf' I texted.
"gESP IS THAT (Y/n) SEND A SELFIE I HAVEN'T SEE YOU SINCE YOU MOVED" Alice texted.
I shrugged and took a selfie. I sent it to the group chat.
'wow u still look like a little bitch'
'thank'
'dIANE MOVED BACK HERE SHIT DUDE
SHE HAS MINION CLOTHES
HER BRAS HAVE MINION GOGGLES WHERE HER NIPPLES SHOULD BE' texted Hannah.
'gross'
'guys you need to answer the question' texted Fern
'nah lol, come fight me, Alice'
'Okay well Grayson was texting Riley one night but then she passed out because she's weak so that's when he messaged you but then something happened probably Chat Noir related so Gray started texting me and I became his wingwoman'
'perf'
'I serenaded Riley in the middle of Math class only for Grayson to cut me off at the end and asked her out
it sounds cute but the asking part was really awkward, Hannah send the video of it to (Y/n)'
I now noticed that a shadow was towering over me. One with pigtails. I looked up and saw Marinette. She held something behind her. I placed down my phone. Is she really here to apologize?
Tikki flew out from behind her, just floating above Marinette's shoulder. Marinette gave a small smile that quickly faltered, "Hey.. (Y/n)." she said.
"Hi Marinette..." I replied.
Marinette opened her mouth to speak but quickly shut it. She froze up. Just like how she does around Adrien. Tikki shook her head.
"Marinette, come on, tell them."
Marinette shook herself out of it and looked down at me, "(Y/n), I'm sorry how I treated you. I was being a jerk and well, pretty... obsessive. I know you like Adrien and I shouldn't let that get to me. I acted like Chloe- a brat. I'm not asking you to forgive me but I still want to be your friend."
I chuckled and gave a smile, "Alright, I accept your apology."
"Really?"
"Yes."
She smiled brightly and jumped down to hug me, she dropped the thing she held behind her back. It fell to the ground with a soft thud. It wasn't too loud but it was loud enough to startle Marinette. She wrapped her arms around my torso and let out a small "eek".
"Marinette you forgot about the present." said Tikki.
Presents? I quite enjoy presents.
"Oh! Right!" she let go off me and got my present. I took it from her and opened it up. There inside was a scarf with my Hogwart's house colors.
"I had to look at your blog to find out the mascot and stuff. Now thinking about it, I should have probably got something else since summer is coming soon." Marinette said sheepishly.
I shrugged, "Well I may have been here for.." I counted on my fingers, ".. 7 months but I still get cold. Remember, Californians must be at 98 degrees or else they die."
"98?!" she gasped.
"Oh fuck, um right you use the metric system fuck.. Um... that's like... 36 point something."
"That's much better cause," she laughed, "98 is like an inferno. Why 36 though?"
"Because, if a Californian is at normal human temperature, something is either very wrong with their air conditioning. If it's at 73 degrees um, 22 degrees in my house I'll be under my covers and refuse to move. Trust me, the heat waves are bad and Cali's still in a drought."