Bad Humour : Dear Diary by Tze Ern
I warn you now, what you are about to read is really. . . really bad humour. . .
-x-
Dear Diary,
I ate a sandwich today. I realized for the first time that one does not use a spoon to eat them. I was at the deli and I ordered my usual, a turkey breast with salmon, bacon , and sweet and sour sauce, sat down, and began to eat, spoon in hand. The man next to me turned and said, " You know . . . You don' t use a spoon to eat sandwiches. . . "
This blew me away. All that I had known. . . destroyed. My world became a swirling mist of the unknown. Every fact that I thought I knew suddenly came into question. The way of the universe died that day.
The man grew concerned about the glazed look I had while I was shaking uncontrollably in the chair. I snapped to, spoon still in my grasp. Then, I stabbed him with it. Repeatedly.
Thanks for ruining my day, ass.
Sincerely, Dean.
-x-
Okay, so this is going to be my first humour story here, on Wattpad. I've never actually wrote a humour piece before in my entire life, so this may be a little too goofy with a tad of ridiculousness. We will follow the strange majestic life of Dean Wright. Goodie.
-x-
Vote if you have never seen anyone eat a sandwich with a spoon.
-x-
