Writings On My Wall

The Realization

As much as I cry, no one sees my tears...

As much as I am scared of pain, no one sees my fears.

As much as I want to leave, no one is holding me here...

I stay because loneliness is a thing that I fear.

I stay because "no one else will want me" is the thing that I hear...

And I believe it...

I am washed up and unwanted.

As much as I struggle, no one knows of my troubles...

Not a soul knows about my struggle.

As much as I yearn for your acceptance...

I am more than grateful for each lesson.

I thank the stars above for my every blessing...

That you gave to me

It is those same very stars that I put my faith in.

As much as I want to breakdown...

I know I should not throw my towel to the ground.

I keep on, quietly, without a sound...

As much as I scream and cry in the inside,

I seriously want to release this agony out loud.

But my mind won't let me...

I don't want to be looked at differently.

I don't want to be judged...

As much as I held back saying this

all I need is your love.

I am just desperate for your attention...

I am in need of your time and affection.

I am tired of the heartache

scars from depression.

Non-stop praying for a new beginning.

How much longer do I have to keep praying?

As much as I want this to work...

I have grown to realize my worth.

You are no longer worth my time.

© Nikey Pasco-Dunston 2016

*Please Leave Your Thoughts & Click On The Star Below To Vote For My Poem. Thank you!*