The Day

(23) Awakening

                I pulled back away from him, wrinkling my nose when he licked it. I grabbed his ears and scratched behind them, causing him to stick his tongue out and pant adorably. I put my forehead to his and allowed myself to look deep into my dog’s eyes.  “I love you, Mr. Meowsir,” I said, poking his nose.

                Getting up from my crouched position, I patted my dog on the head once and then headed over to the kitchen to feed him and get some breakfast.

                As soon as I walked in, I laid eyes on my mother and father talking to an empty space. A vile rose in my throat and I ran back to my room, slamming the door behind me. I crashed into my bed and smothered my face in my pillow, and began to cry my eyes out.

                I couldn’t do it.

                This wasn’t fair. All I did was ask for one more day to tell Brent I love him! I never meant for anyone to be hurt. I never meant for Brent to be stuck in here with me. I never asked for this.

                I stopped myself. Yes I did. No matter how innocent it was. I asked for this. I wished for this. I’m the reason for everyone being in this situation.

                Grabbing at my hair, I began twisting it, releasing the pain from my body. I began convulsing again, but not from blood. From hate towards myself.

                Why do I always manage to mess things up? I’m the reason that Brent is in this situation. I’m the reason that Alex is dead.

                I’m the reason Meg is dead.

                I began to choke on my sobs, an empty feeling in my stomach either from pain or from hunger. I dismissed it and started to pound my fist on my bed.

                This isn’t fair! They didn’t deserve this!

                Life is temporary.

                We are always so self-absorbed about our own problems that we have no idea that they could end soon and not in the way we wanted.

                Our life is as beautiful as a rose. As fragile as a butterfly.

                I felt a hand on my back and I froze. “Sh…” the voice behind the hand said.

                “Brent?” I asked, and I turned to look right into the green eyes if my boyfriend.

                “Yes, honey, it’s me,” he said softly. “Are you ok?”

                “No, I’m not,” I said. “Andrea killed Meg.”