The Showstopper

Chapter 26

A/N: Long chapter with a lot of stuff in it and a few songs.

Camila's POV

My heart was beating so fast after I left the stairwell, I thought it was going to explode. I ran into the bathroom and tried my best to breathe as I was gasping for air. Sitting in one of the stalls, I just sobbed. I sobbed all hour, not bothering to go back to class or anything.

    How could she? How could she do that to me? Do that to us? After everything we've been through, she goes and ruins it all? I thought she loved me. I loved her so fucking much it hurt. I finally got together with someone and of course this had to happen. Our relationship was too good to be true. I was in love with someone who I thought would never ever break my heart, who made me the happiest human being alive, and who made me stronger, smarter, more confident, and comfortable. But I guess that was all a lie. Now, everything is over and I'm alone again.

     Her reputation from last year was rough, but I didn't see that at all when we were together. I thought I could trust her and that she left all that bullshit in the past. But she's still the same. I'm such an idiot for believing she was nothing like that anymore, but she's still an alcoholic, a pothead, a sex addict, and now a cheater. Even if she just did it that one time, she still did it. There's no excuse. And it hurt me so incredibly much. She thought we were broken up but it didn't take her more than 15 minutes to decide to get back into those bad habits. It just shows she hasn't recovered completely. Lauren may have recovered from doing those things for fun, but she has still yet to recover from doing those things because of anger or whatever erratic emotion. She needed to find a way besides illegal methods to deal with it.

    Lauren was upset that even if she made a mistake by drinking, I still didn't support her through it, but it wasn't okay. She had control of her decisions and she made the wrong one. She needs help not sympathy. That bitch, Keana, can kiss Lauren's ass and tell her it's all going to be fine, but it only will be when she gets the much needed help again. Until then, I can't be with her. I can't be with someone who is ruining and throwing their life away. Drinking and smoking moderately is fine like, I'm very much okay with that, but not when it's an addiction.

    And cheating. That was really the deal breaker. It was already disturbing enough that Lauren used to sleep with a lot of girls, but cheating was a whole other story. Maybe she was faithful to me during our relationship, but it also took her less than 15 minutes to decide to have sex with someone else after we "broke up." Worst of all, Keana. That girl already made me feel insecure enough and now that she was back in Lauren's life, I just felt like complete and utter shit. I couldn't help but think that Lauren found her prettier and better than me. Lauren didn't think she was cheating, but she cheated because I didn't actually break up with her. And she went to another girl just like that, so quickly and easily. That also proved that she was still all about sex. No wonder she did me so many times.

    Everything just comes back to commitment. That was what Lauren broke. She broke her commitment of staying faithful and staying sober. I hated to see this happen to her but I just couldn't bring myself to continue on. I at least knew better than to do that. I used to always forgive so easily and it's actually really hard not to with Lauren to be honest. I mean, after all I was in love with her and we were together for three months. A short time but we did a lot of incredible things and shared such a strong love. But not strong enough, I guess. Maybe I will be able to forgive her but definitely not right now. She's got to fix herself. And I don't know what's going to happen with us in the future, but at least for now, we can't be together. Even if we wanted to be, we couldn't.

Lauren's POV

And there's no remedy

For memory