She Was Broken Beyond Repair

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

"Ten minutes that's all you have to finish your crap!" She said giving a death glare.

"Thank You. Now, I know the past days have been very stressful for you and all because of me. The way I have treated you, kissing you, getting close to you was inappropriate. But in my defence, I want to be with you, I want us to get back together.

I have made horrible and unforgivable mistakes in the last couple of years and the last few days, and I truly feel ashamed of it. Everybody deserves a chance, Paisley, even I do. I may sound selfish, but that's what I am! I am like that! The only time in my life I was considerate towards others was when you were with me. Being without you has been the most painful time for me.

All the things I had said and done all those years back, were and are meaningless. I was only high on rage! I know I have stooped down to the lowest level possible, but that was because I wanted revenge. The revenge which I had been wanting since the time I was a teenager!

I grew up like that, with my mind constantly surrounded by the thoughts of getting even. Believe me, the night I had thrown you out of the house in the middle of the night was the end of me. I have just been existing for the past years, not living. All the time I had called you inappropriate words that night was hurting me more than it was hurting you. You don't know how much I wanted to get you back inside the house when I had seen you crying outside the whole night. The time I had left you money and jobless was cheapest move I could play! But I had to do it, I had to because I needed you to hate me. Hate me, so that you can move on and be with someone else who will keep you happy. Each day without you was and is meaningless.

Seven months after you left I had started looking for you, I didn't know you had left London till that time. I have had the best P.I's to look for you, for the last four years and finally I found you now! Each day when they would tell me the same thing that they couldn't get any trace of you, had my heart bleeding. I prayed for you to be fit and fine, for you to be alive. The thought for your death made me sob. That day in the café when you had told me that you had tried to kill yourself twice, left me with fear. Fear of loosing you forever! I don't want to lose you, love.

Sure, there are ample number of differences between us which will stop you from coming back to me again, but we have to work them out. We will work them out together! No couple is perfect and neither are we, but that's was is needed in a relationship, right Everything cannot be like a bed of flowers, there are thorns present. And these thorns or problems as you may say, help us become more strong, help us to know each other better. To be one another's strenght and constant pillar of support.

I am not trying to manipulate you as your friend says, I am just merely trying to explain my mistakes to you from my perspective, sweetheart. All my words and justifications may seem fake and a game to you, and I do not blame you for it.

You have all the right in this world to hate me and I am not complaing. But I want to make this very clear that I will not stop or crib till the time I will earn your love, trust and you back! All I want in my life is you and our children, for us to be like and normal, loving and complete family. I am not asking for your forgiveness, because that is not possible for you. I am asking for another chance to prove myself worthy of you and the kids. Forgiving me will not be easy at all and I don't even mind if you don't, but please just comeback to me, darling. Give me one last and final chance to prove myself and restoring our marriage. I love you, baby! I need you with me sweetheart, please give me a chance." I said looking into her eyes that held no trace of any emotion whatsoever. Infront of me was a standing a woman with a blank face and cold eyes that were a mirror to her soul.

Paisley stayed quiet for a while and eventually spoke to my utter surprise.

"I don't want to have a discussion with you on this, but I will, to make things clear. Whatever you did to me is unforgetable. I had trusted you the most, you knew everything about me and how much faith I had in you, but still you did what you had to do.