I rub my eyes, forcing myself to stay awake. I have to forget about him. I can't go to sleep thinking about him. Dr. Reid. The kitchen is clean, my playlist is over, and it's 3a.m. and none of the adult swim shows are good anymore.
Okay. I can do this. Just... Relax.
I can't relax. At all. I pace around the room, hoping to think of something to distract me. Derek walks out of the bedroom.
"Alice, come on. It's getting late. You can't stay up all night." He complains, walking towards me.
"I just can't get my mind off of something," I tell him desperately. He looks at me pitifully.
"Okay. I can fix that. Psychology, remember? Come on. Sit down on the bed. I'll help you," he replies, taking my hand.
I sit Indian style on the bed. He sits across from me.
"Okay. What are you thinking of?" He asks innocently. What do I tell him? I don't want him to think I'm in love with Reid or anything.
"The team," I admit somewhat honestly.
"Okay.." He says again, confused. He lets it slide.
"What do I do?" I ask desperately.
"Well, now that I know you weren't thinking of your sister or anything.." He trails off, not meeting my gaze. He knows I don't like to talk about her.
"Think about.... Rosco." He suggests.
"Rosco? My dead puppy Rosco?" I repeat, bewildered.
"Yes," he answers sheepishly. "Think about the fun times you had playing with him, and remember his fur, and his eyes, and the way he smelled. Think about it all. Just Rosco." He finishes. I nod slowly.
"Okay.." I agree absently. I'm already thinking about him. His brown hair, his hazel eyes, the way he smells...
No. Rosco. The puppy.
I lay down on the pillow, above the covers. "Rosco." I mutter. Rosco.
His golden coat. His little yip. His dark brown eyes. The way he always smelled of maple syrup, even though I'd never had pancakes...
I close my eyes.
His oversized paws. The way he would chase the frisbee. How he swam with one ear under the water. How he would roll over on his back so I could pet his soft tummy. His awful breath, how he could always make me smile...
I'm there. I see a little girl with black hair throw a tennis ball. I see a little golden retriever puppy run after it. I see a car coming. I see the puppy run into the street.. I can't watch it. I turn around. There it is again. Tears stream down my face; I scream bloody murder. I cover my face with my hands and I can still see it. I finally do something. I run. I run towards the car, and the car stops. The puppy is saved. I walk out of the way; the car starts again. And runs over the puppy.
I scream and run, not even feeling my legs. Then I fall. I can't get up. "Rosco!" I scream. "Rosco!"
Derek shakes me awake. I'm sweating, but I'm freezing. "Alice, Alice. It was just a dream." He mumbles soothingly but sleepily. Obviously I woke him up.
"I don't want to think about Rosco," I whimper childishly.
"Then don't think about the team," he counters, smiling. I smile back.
"Okay," I agree.
"Oh, I have to go in for work. Would you mind driving me?" He asks, his tone hopeful.
"Of course I'll drive you! Just let me change and get ready," I respond. He thanks me and I get up out of the bed and grab some clothes. I trot into the bathroom and shower, straighten my hair, put on some makeup, brush my teeth, and change into my outfit: an orange tank top and light-wash skinny jeans.
I pull into the parking lot. "Do you want me to walk you in?" I offer, needing some reason to get out of this enclosed area.
"Sure," he agrees, and I step out of the car, my gladiator sandals slapping against the asphalt.
He leads me in, explaining to the few who give me questioning looks that I am his girlfriend. I stop at his cubicle.
"Bye," I say, twisting around to walk back out.
As I twist around, I run into Dr. Reid. My cheeks turn slightly pink. "Sorry," I mutter, brushing past him. When I turn the corner, I see him staring at me wide-eyed, a look that reads: "you're not supposed to be here" easily noticeable as his eyebrows furrow slightly. I don't stop moving; I just put my head down and keep walking.
But there's still one thing on my mind.
I have to see him again.
_____
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Ugh. I molded my mouth guard today. I burnt my gums and I cut my finger trying to snip off the handle thingy. Right near the little webbing. It hurt. I bled. ANYWHAH, please comment your thoughts, feedback, or any qualms or misgivings you might have. Thanks for reading! Mwah!
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Hidden // Spencer Reid
Fanfiction"Well, it's Alice now," I correct him, and his brow furrows. "No, it's not." I roll my eyes. "Yes, Spencer. It's Alice. I didn't change my name for people to go poking around in my past." "But what's your real name, the one your mother and fath...
