"These tears are for joy"

I'm not hopeless as you think I am.
I am very sad but I'm not down.
I am down but I am not dead.
I am dead but I am not abandoned from life.
And though I am abandoned, no-not from life.

I cry so many tears. So many tears of strength
Because I'm weak but I'm strong.
Let me try to explain.

These tears? Are for joy.

Yes!! They are for joy!!

I'm not happy but I am appreciative that I acknowledge myself because I am awake in my tiny side of my brain.

I am tired but I'm here and partially awake.

I'm not gone but I'm standing!! and ,afraid.

These tears are for joy!!

Not of happiness but of embrace..

Of the appreciative days..of knowledge
I brace.

*fin.*