What Not to Do With your Stories + Other Randomness

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Guys, somebody that I know now knows that I have a wattpad account.

For the love of anything that is holy, she better not read any of my random stuff because if she does, she's going to fall over backwards and die.

The billionaire guy is always super famous and super intense with everything. 

Really?

Unless you're Bill Gates, then I haven't heard of any famous billionaires like that. 

When bad boys be like "I put a tack in the teacher's chair, I am SUCH a badbehind."

You have so much to learn, dude.

Nerdy girl who is in love w/ the bad boy- "I forgive you for all the stuff that you did to me because you went through so much when you were younger!"

That's not how it works.

Nerdy girl be like "I read books for fun, I am such a nerd."

Reading books does not classify you as a nerd. 

Alpha dude be like "I'm only 18 but I'm ruthless and I run a huge pack of hunters."

*claps* Am I supposed to be awed?

Mate girl be like "He was such a jerk to me, but he has changed so much, so I'm going to forgive him and have children with him. 

Ew. 

Best friend dude be like "I've always had a crush on you, ever since that day in the park when we first met..."

You idiot, why'd you date her best friend and treat her terribly then?

Newbie guy who dates the best friend dude's best friend "She's so pretty but I feel like Best friend dude has a crush on her. We shall fight for her."

Umm... how about no?

The girl best friend "I loved him but I also love the other guy, what do I do? This is such a hard choice even though I'm a twelve year old girl with no life and this relationship won't ever last."

Such hard choices.

Girl insanely attracted to random male- "I drool all over his abs as he-"

STOP IT RIGHT THERE. Nobody needs to hear about all that...

Supervillian dude- "I was so misunderstood but then SHE came along and I turned into a superhero." *swoons*

Umm, congrats, I guess.

The guy named Esmeralda- "Who the named me?"

The girl named Champagne- "I think my parents were drunk when they named me."

That person over there named Demeter Raven English Charlie Jordonoa- "I... I don't even know..."

That girl who writes a story about herself and 1D having a 6-some... 5-some? Something like that "THIS. IS. THE. BEST. THING. EVER."

Nope.