Already Broken

Ecstasy

She nodded her head.

"Umm, how about you do the cooking, aye," he asked sullenly, going over to his living room.

"Oh...okay," she said.

~

Eliza made soup.

When she was stirring the final concoction, she called Tommy into the kitchen.

He had been enjoying a drink and waiting for her to be finished. Although he watched her in the bar, he did not want to watch her cook.

In his home, where Toni had been. That would just be too much.

He came over to the stove and set his drink down.

"It's finished," she said, smiling. She raised the ladle to his lips, using her other hand to catch any drips.

He leaned forward and slurped some from the spoon. It was delicious.

"Wow," he said, wiping his mouth. "It's really good."

She nodded and smiled. "My mother's recipe."

She placed the ladle down and looked back toward him.

In that moment, her eyes were speaking to him. Asking him for something.

He knew exactly what it was.

He took a quiet breath. She moved closer.

He had not kissed a woman since...

Since Toni was alive.

Still, he went along with it when she leaned forward and kissed him.

Noticing his compliance, Eliza deepend the kiss, making room for more.

Suddenly, they weren't in the kitchen anymore but the bedroom. And she was getting undressed.

To Tommy, this was all moving so fast. A little too fast.

She unbuttoned his shirt, opening it all the way as she gently pushed him onto the bed.

He focused on breathing. If he just breathed, he could get through this. It was not like he was forcing himself to do this. He wanted to do this. He wanted to be with her.

Or at least, he thought he did.

His train of thought crashed when she reached for his pants. She was on her way to unbuckling them when he gasped and pulled away.

She rested above him, catching her breath.

He leaned back on his elbows and avoided eye contact.

"Tommy, what happened?" She asked breathlessly.

"I," he began, taking deep breaths, "I'm sorry, I can't."

Slowly, he sat up.

"It's me," he continued, "I can't. I'm not feeling...up to it."

"What...are you sick?" She asked.

"Something like that. I might be coming down with something. I'm not sure," he looked up at her.

Her smile was compassionate.

She gently kissed his forehead.

"Alright, Tommy," she said. "Tell me when you're feeling better."

She stood, dressed herself, and left the room.

Thomas waited a few moments until he heard her leave the house.

He sighed and laid his head on the sheets.

When he was ready, he sat up and leaned against the bed post.

He had been fooling himself all night. He was not ready to be with other women and God knows if he ever would be.

Resting his head against the wall, he pulled his pants down and began to feel himself.

His breathing was slow and even as he closed his eyes.

When he opened them, there she was.

Toni was riding him ever so gently and carefully, like she always did.

She was completely uncovered, as she moved on top of him.

His breathing increased and so did hers.

"God, I missed you," he said.

She smiled and laughed softly.

"Tommy, why did you send that woman away?" She asked.

"Toni," he closed his eyes and bowed his head, shaking it, "Toni, don't ask me that."

"Tommy, you know you need to move on," she said, rubbing his shoulders.

"No, Toni, don't say that," he said.

"Besides, she was cute. C'mon, you have to admit that," Toni said.

"Don't talk like that Toni, don't...just don't," he said.

"One day, you'll have to move-," She began.

But he suddenly grabbed her shoulders, shaking her. "What don't you fucking understand? I'm never moving on!" He yelled.

His heart refused to.

Toni looked upset, but he knew she still loved him.

He opened his mouth to apologize to her but in that moment, his ecstasy faded away and so did she.

~

Idk about you all, but my heart is still crying over Toni.

Thanks for reading, I hope you enjoyed. Don't forget to comment and vote ❤️