Forget Regret: Fuenciado

The Balcony Scene

The Balcony Scene: Chapter 8-

It's been 2 weeks since Vic moved out. I've just been numb ever since. He didn't even say anything to me when he left. I did find a note he wrote to me a couple of days ago. It said:

Dear Jaime,
This was fun. I'll miss you. Don't bother calling me or anything. I can't do this anymore. Bye.
- dearest regards, Vic

I don't know what hurt more. The fact that he told me not to call, or the fact that he put "dearest regards" as if we were business partners or something. I mean, I guess that's what our relationship was supposed to be in the first place. Strictly business. But no. I had to sleep with him. He had to let me sleep with him. I got feelings for him. He made me think that he had feelings for me too.

I can't go in the basement anymore. Two days after he left I went down there. I held myself together for about a minute before I started sobbing. I kicked the flimsy metal bed frame and bent it until it was destroyed, I threw the white board that was still up against the wall across the room, I tipped over the old dresser that he kept his stuff in, and I broke the drawers in it. After that I just sat on the cold floor, shaking. That was the worst day. Now I just hate how torn up he has me. I mean the guy was just a fucking teacher.

But still, I hated my mom for making Vic be the one expense we cut from our lives, I hated Vic for ever letting me be with him, and most of all I hated myself for the whole thing. It was all my fault. I run my fingers through my hair and take a glance at my phone. Of course, there's nothing there. Why would there be. "Jaime!" My mother shouts. She's been staying at home more often since Vic moved out (luckily she wasn't there when I had my break down). I think she's worried about me but I can never be too sure with my mother.

"Yeah, Ma?" I yell at her from my room. "I need you to go to the store while I'm at work. There's a list on the counter. Goodbye." She yells back at me. She doesn't say I love you. I sigh and stand up off of my bed. I grab my car keys and take a look out of my blinds as my mother drives away. I jog down stairs to find a little sticky note with a few items jotted down on it. I take it with me as I walk out of the door. I sit in my white Nissan and stare at the wheel. It's a nice day out. It's later in the afternoon, about 4:00. I don't want to drive to the store. Doing anything seems so incredibly mundane. He made me lose all motivation to do anything. I hate him.

I regretfully start the car and make my way to the grocery store. I swerve in and out of the isles. Freezer section: frozen peas and ice cream. Refrigerator section: eggs and milk.
Isle 4: Doritos. Isle 7: trash bags and laundry detergent. Isle 11: Vic.

He's standing there looking at a box of Ritz crackers. As I turn the cart the slight shriek of the wheel makes him look my direction. He looks so surprised when he sees me. Like he thought he would never see me again, or at least he hoped. I tried to exit the isle as I felt the inevitable tears forming. But not before I heard a "Jaime" from behind me. The tears were flowing at that point and I left the cart in the next isle. I didn't need him trying to follow me and talk while I was checking out.

Sobbing in your car in a Walmart parking lot is always a great way to spend your time. I never thought I would be one of those people. I mean, we weren't even together. What's the point. The small amount of hope I got when he said my name was pathetic. I wanted to stop and turn around. I wanted to fall into his arms and tell him to love me. I wanted him. Vic Fuentes. That name made me want to sob and scream all at once. I felt sorry for him in a way. Sorry that he could be so god damn cruel to someone who showed him nothing but affection.

As I drove home I blasted Disloyal Order of Water Buffalos by Fall Out Boy.

So boycott love
Detox just to retox
And I'd promise you anything for another shot at life
And perfect boys with their perfect lives
Nobody wants to hear you sing about tragedy

That song seemed to fit right now. I was almost done crying by the time I pulled into the drive way. My mom would be mad that I didn't get the groceries that she asked. I'd just say something came up with online school that I had to do. I'd actually been behind in school, for obvious reason. It was actually a pretty stupid excuse if I was being honest, but I wasn't up to doing anything productive at the moment.

(Sorry this was short but this story is almost at 1K!! That's amazing, thank you guys so much for the support. I'm trying to update this more but know updates will be kind of slow. I saw FOB on the 1st and it was amazing and they played Disloyal Order and I thought it fit really well with this chapter so. Until next time- Kalista :)