The Value

Chapter Three

 I sat and stared at the microwaved pancakes in front of me. I was starving, but couldn't eat a bite. James and Rex were the only ones eating. I used my fork(we weren't allowed knives, probably because of people like Rex) to cut the pancakes into tiny pieces. Part of it was from the nervousness, the other part was the fact i could still feel the women's thinly gloved hands in my mouth. Right now the only thing I really wanted to do was brush my teeth. 

  "Rex... could you ask her if I can go to my room?" I said, pointing to the thin lady with some long German name no one can remember. "You go ask." He said this with his mouth full, syrup running down his chin. " I can't, she doesn't speak English." "Well maybe you should learn German." I pushed my plate of untouched food towards him. "Please?" He rolled his eyes.

  He slid his chair back, and began to rapidly speak German to her. To me it sounded like he was trying to talk with his mouth full of rocks or something while coughing. He said something to her that made her laugh, and she handed him the keys. 

  As we walked down the hall I asked "What was that all about?" "She asked if Jesse was going too. She's obsessed with him, and she can only talk to me about it. It gets annoying." "Can't she do something to keep him here?" "Trust me, she tried. She even offered Jones two weeks of pay." My mouth dropped open. " She didn't buy into it?" 

  As soon as we were in our room, he locked the door. His eyes looked sternly at me. " Maps, listen to me. They are going to use Jesse. I'm almost positive." His voice faltered a little. " You have the best chance of surviving. Besides me of course. Whatever you do, don't try to stop them from taking James. You could get us all killed." I opened my mouth object, but he had already clamped a hand over my mouth. 

    " Listen. It's just the way it is. No one can help it. You know Carrots, the kid who got into the symphonic orchestra?" I nodded. Rex had taught him how to play the piano. " They used him. That's how bad it is right now. So just, don't be surprised."

 I nodded, and he removed his hand and gave me the keys. I walked backwards into the bathroom and slammed the door. 

  I could barley stand. I felt like my legs had turned into jelly, and my stomach was sloshing around. Carrots was marked unusable after his audition tape. He was so good. My chances were so low now. 

 Tears started to run down my face. I curled up in the corner of the shower, wishing I could just disappear. Then again....

  I took my belt off, and tied it tightly on the rod that held the curtains. I had no idea if it would support my weight, but it was worth a try. I pulled the stool up and stood on it. I fit my neck into the noose.  My  breaths were ragged, every inch of me was covered in a hot sweat. They would find me suffocated. Rex would probably find me first. 

   My tears increased. I felt so scared I felt sick. Everything was a blur. And out of the heat of the moment, I kicked the stool out from under me.