The Spawns

The Spawns | Chapter I -- The Correct Term Is Hangover

           “Your car, it’s your car’s fault Jay,” Cole felt the need to mention. The car was a gift for my grandparents for my graduation last year. A BMW M3 E92, I didn’t understand the big fuss about it though. I loved the car, sure, but with the kind of cars they had in their garage it wasn’t that big of a deal. Heck, even with the car Cole had at home and the one his parents had he shouldn’t be enjoying this so much.

           “Alright, well I’ll head over to your place as soon as my fathers stop hugging me and telling me how much I’ve grown.” I’m sure she was rolling her eyes just then. “I’m eighteen damn it, I started my period at twelve, I ain’t growing anymore.”

           “Aw, another of those, sharing too much information moments that I’m so fond of,” I said in a fake nice voice.

           Her voice was her playful-evil when she answered. “You started it when I walked in on you…”

           “Shut up,” I cut her before she said more. I knew exactly what she was going to say.

           “Fine! Anyway, I should get back to the hystericals. I actually had to hide in the freaking bathroom to call you. I’m telling you,” she whined “I can hear them scratching away on my door with their manicured hands.”

           “Please, they’re not that gay,” I snorted.

           “Somehow, I think I should take offense to this.” She was narrowing her eyes, I just knew it.

           I was almost unsettling how well I knew this girl. I smiled. “I missed you Mai.”

           “Missed you too, wanker,” she laughed.

           I groaned. “Oh shut up!”

           “See yoooou,” she just answered in her since song voice, surly grinning from ear to ear and ended the call.

           I shut the phone smiling at it, and then threw it back on my bags on the back seat.

           “Honestly man, what’s up?” I asked, stretching my arms again. “Why are you in such a hurry to get home? You miss watching your parents making out on every surface possible? Or is it your cat? You’re missing your cat, aren’t you?”

           “I told you Jay, it’s the car” Cole rubbed his cheek on the steering wheel for emphasis.

           I snorted. “Yeah, right! It’s your cat!”

           “Don’t you ‘yeah, right’ me,” he exclaimed, tapping the top of my head with his finger. That hurt.

           “God dammit, my head”

           “Jayden, my brother, just rub some dirt on it. Pain is all a mental thing, it’s not real. It’s just electric current going through your brain.”

           “So, if I punched you in the face right now, the pain wouldn’t be real so you shouldn’t get back at me for it?” I smirked.

           Cole was silent, drumming his fingers on the steering wheel and then took a deep breath and looked at me, with the kind of face you make when you’re about to tell someone they have cancer. “Jayden, you have a small penis.”

           “Oh god dammit,” I groaned and punched his arm.

           And Cole laughed, his whole-hearted laugh, the one where he was throwing his head back, mouth wide open. I should be making a dirty joke right now with the face he was making.