Almost Normal

Chapter 22

Hope seems to falter in times of self doubt, love tends to lead to heartbreak, and 'Happily ever after,' sometimes doesn't last forever. It's just the facts, the facts that I couldn't see in front of me.

I just need to write all of this down. Once it's all on paper, I can easily walk away from it, and that's what I intend to do. Walk away from my fantasy. That's all that I'm leaving behind, and in return, I'll have my friend back. I need to keep that in my mind, or I fear that I'll resort back to jealousy. So write, Armin...keep writing..."

I sigh and close my notebook. That's enough writing for one day.

I stand up and stretch out my back. It was a little hard putting all of that down onto paper, but like I wrote in my journal, it just had to be done.

I walk into the bathroom and look at my reflection. Tomorrow, I'm going to be twenty years old. It doesn't seem like it at all, though. I still feel my scared little sixteen year old self residing somewhere inside my body. I shake my head, and strip off all my clothing soon after I turn the shower on.

Although, I just stand there. I look at myself in my mirror and examine my body. My blonde hair touches my shoulders, which leads down to my chest. My semi toned stomach look dull as moisture builds up on the mirror. I don't look like myself. I'm not particularly sad, but yet I'm not happy either. I just feel empty. I pinch myself to make sure that I'm still existing, and when I feel the slight pull of skin, I sigh and step into the shower.

Water trickles down my body, and makes my skin glisten. I reach for my shampoo and conditioner, but they soon fall onto the ground as my grasp wasn't strong enough. I groan and bend down, but my ears perk up at the sound of my phone ringing. I dry my hands on the towel next to the sink, and I look at the caller ID. My screen lights up a picture of Eren and I right before Christmas break. We're sitting around my fake tree, and my smile is much wider than what've shown these past few months.

I stare at my phone and contemplate answering it. I just want to stare at the screen for a little longer, but after a few more rings, I decide to press the green little phone icon.

"Hello?" I speak into the phone.

"Hey, Armin. Where are you right now? I can barely hear you."

I sigh and grab a towel from the ground and quickly dry off. "Sorry, I was in the shower. Can you hear me now?"

"Yeah, that's much better, but listen, I was wondering if you were doing anything tonight? I think that we should go out for dinner or something..."

I can hear the hesitation in his voice, and I ponder at what he could be anxious about. "Yeah, that sounds great with me. What time do you wanna go and eat?"

"Um, is seven alright with you?"

"Seven sounds perfect, I'll meet you at your dorm, okay?" Eren agrees and that's it. Dead air plays itself on my end of the conversation and I turn my phone off. That was a little strange, even for Eren. Although, I try and continue my day as normal. I go to classes, even though all we're doing in them is having boring lectures and random projects since end of the semester is in about two weeks. I've taken about almost all of my finals already, so my endless nights of studying only happen about once a week.

I skateboard from class to class. I doodle a little in my journal from boredom in creative writing, until I feel a presence of eyes around me. I look up and blush from embarrassment as Professor Petra had apparently called my name while I was zoning out.

"I-I'm sorry Professor, I-I was zoning out..."

I hear chuckles around the room, and I look down at my desk, this day has just been going along swimmingly. She beckons me over to her desk with her finger, and I groan and stand up and take the walk of shame to her desk.