Lists | Phan

Three: Keeping Tabs

"You think so?" Her voice was so delicate, completely the opposite of the way she fought. "Maybe it is a little too long..."

She frowned slightly, more to herself than Phil. She looked up at him; face a canvas of an inward turmoil,

"Do you think I should cut it short?" She sounded unsure. Most girls were very particular about their hair, but Phil wouldn't have pegged Carrie for the type. Phil smiled, more because he was happy that Carrie was asking him for advice on something he was planning on telling her to do anyway, than in reassurance.

"If that's what you think is right." He offered, patting her shoulder. It was always good to let them think they were making their own decisions.

"But..." Carrie trailed off again, looking at the sky. "It'll be winter soon...My neck will get cold."

Phil almost laughed.

"I'll buy you a scarf."

~~~~~~~~

When Phil got home, he crashed out on his bed immediately. He was so tired. So tired and so stressed.

He fished around in his bag for his notebook and found today's page – quickly crossing various points from his lists,

Get somene to skip class with me.

And

Figure out a way to kill Chris's feelings for Carrie.

He quickly wrote a separate Carrie's going to cut her hair because I told her to on his achievements section. He smiled softly to himself.

He turned to the back of the notebook where he had the names of his acquaintances and their attributes, and cast his mind back to the Dan incident. The pen suddenly became harder to hold as he wrote down his new finding...one of the ways that Dan used to manipulate people.

Phil felt his face heat up again.

Dan seems to be a master of sexual manipulation.

And Phil could understand how. He was all unattainable perfection, full of icy glares, filthy smirks and a sensual kind of confidence. And he had every reason to be confident - he was six feet of beautiful. But Phil couldn't help but wonder if Dan had actively studied sexual manipulation, or if it just came naturally to him. Like, what if he just woke up one morning, realised that he was gorgeous and decided that no one in the world was deserving of his attention unless they gave him something first? Or that he could use his body to get what he wanted?

Phil groaned and threw an arm over his flushed face. At least he could cross Find out more about Dan off of his list but...

Just watching Dan in action was disturbingly exciting, he couldn't imagine being on the receiving end...

When Phil fell asleep, his dreams were all teasing smirks, promises of "making it up to him" and Dan, Dan, Dan.

~~~~~~~~~

The next day, Phil entered the cafeteria to see that Carrie had cut her hair into a short bob and he made sure to compliment her on it – a warped sense of joy burning in his stomach.

The morning of the next day saw Phil wrapping a long scarf around Carrie's neck, coiling it around and around her like a loving cobra.

The day after that, Phil patted Chris on the shoulder, eyes overflowing with calculated sympathy as the two-toned male sobbed into the crisp autumn grass.

"I don't get why this hurts so much" Yeah, neither do I.

"Why am I even fuckin' crying?" No seriously, why are you.

"Man, this is embarrassing." Fuck, you're telling me...

But still, watching his friend in such pain made his chest constrict in the most repulsive way.

Phil buried the feeling and let sweet, comforting nothings tumble from his lips – conveniently forgetting that it was 100% his fault that Chris was like this.

Chris didn't need to value anyone more than he valued Phil. No one did.

Phil made sure to check up on Chris every day; and when he invited him over to his room to watch a marathon of Come Dine With Me, Chris slung an arm around his shoulder, gave him a lopsided grin and thanked Phil for being such a good friend.

Phil let out a breath that he never realised he was holding.

~~~~~
Hey guys
Sorry it's been so long
I've been through a lot lately
I broke my foot, and my family is fighting, and I'm not feeling too well
Next chapter out on Friday
Thanks
    ~Sleepy